What did the American say to the Russian? Hello, but the Russian did not understand

How do you make a baby stop crying?you scream at it and throw it at wall

What did the man say to the teacup? Nothing. He was drunk and on the floor.

What's the difference between ten dead babies and a Ferrari? There's no Ferrari in my garage.

how much dub would a dubstep step if a dubstep could step dub? purple

A bishop died and went to heaven. At the Pearly gates he sees Saint Peter , so he says to Peter "All my life I've been a committed Christian, but I just before I died I was tempted by a woman of ill repute". Saint Peter says "This is just an illusion, your dying brain is merely conjuring up images based on your presuppositions of an 'afterlife'. You have about three seconds left"

Why did the chicken cross the road? because

a jewish man walks into a wall with an erection. what hits first? his erection

What's Green And Has Wheels? Grass, I Was Just Kidding About The Wheels.

Q: What's worse than tripping down the stairs in front of a crowd of people? A: The bombing of Hiroshima

Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

what's worse than a hole in your sock? Getting raped!

chuck norris was bit by a snake, a few hours later he died

A penguin walks into a bakery. The baker asks the penguin: What kind of bread would you like, brown or white? Penguins answers: Well, it doesn't really matter since I drove here.

What did the black man say to the asian man? Whats up man!

Barack Obama walks into a bar. He's black.

Why did the man walk into the bar Because he was an acoholic

Why was the man running? He needed to get somewhere fast.

What do you call a blonde with a diploma? Dum,because blondes are still dum

roses are red violets are blue the sugar bowls empty so is your head

Knock Knock The occupant uses their peephole and realizes it is a familiar face then proceeds to let them in.

How did the man with no arm and no legs get to the store? Well he certainly didn't walk.

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What do you get if you cross James Bond with Osama bin Laden? James bin Laden.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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