Why am I sad right now? Because I just Sh*t my pants.

Why did the woman scream when she saw the mouse? Because she's afraid of technology.

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

Your tell your girlfriend to make you a sandwich, she actually makes one for you.

Roses are red violets are blue im a mass murderer and i will kill your family with no hesitation

Did you know Helen Keller had a Playground in her back yard? Neither did she.

The way I see it, you are pretty lucky I am a tough guy, the kind you like. Anyway you where really wondering if I ever refer myself as a boy? Sigh, I mean I AM A BOY! WHAT? WHAT? Savage jokes? What jokes?

A young boy trips and severly cuts his knee while running down his neighborhood street. He is promptly brought to the hospital to avoid receiving any serious infection.

What is the difference between a jew and a boyscout? A boyscout comes home from camp.

What do you call a white man? A caucasian male.

Wihat's red, green, and goes 100 miles an hour? A frog in a blender!!!!!

a boy named justin littleton made his own anti-joke......

Why did the man rob the house? He had a horrible childhood which led him to making these bad choices.

What did the Chicken say to the Turkey Nothing, Chickens don't talk.

What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? One is a devotee of the torah, one is a delicious meal.

If you dont see banners here it does mean they are not here. P.S Advertising helps fill our pockets and annoy you. Please be understanding in the fact that we will permaban you while grinning if you refuse to UNDER-stand our rule.

Knock Knock Who's there? Do you have a minute to talk about our lord and savior Jesus Christ?

A deaf man walks into a bar. A few minutes later, cops come in and takes the poor man into the cop car and takes him downtown to the precinct for booking. Meanwhile, back in the bar the deaf man drinks his beer and converses with the bartender in sign language.

What is wrong with black stereotypes? Nothing! Basketball is pretty fun if you try it!

Two giraffes walk into a bar, hit their heads, cracktheir skulls and die.

how do we call a person with no body nor nose? a dead guy

Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap ...in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations])That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

Whats worse than being raped? Being raped and murdered.

Why did the little boy chase after his ball? Because it rolled away

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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