What's worse than failing an exam? Failing two exams.

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What’s green and eats nuts? Syphilis.

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What did one platypus say to the other? Whatever noise platypuses make. I'm not sure. I am sure that they lay eggs though.

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Your mother is so fat that when she sits around the house, she feels bad about herself but is too embarrassed to get a gym membership and work-out in public.

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Where would a 65 year old man find a young, attractive woman who would take any interest in him? Very likely in a hospital, but that would be a professional interest, not a sexual one.

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Adolf Hitler. Adolf Hitler, who? Be quiet and hand over your Jews!

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I'm pretty sure you can't throw a fridge...

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This joke isnt funny.

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How much wood would a wood-chuck chuck, If a wood chuck could chuck wood? A full study has never been commissioned into the amount of wood chucked by a groundhog and thus far remains an unknown quantity. ls

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why did the boy fall of the bridge? He got shot in the head.

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? Because she wasn't a woman

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you got Lady Gaga, Taylor Swift, and Reese Witherspoon. Which do you think is more succesful

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Why is there no aspirin in the jungle? Because aspirin is a man-made drug derived from salicylic acid, and it it is this that is extracted from willow bark, which used to be used by Cherokee Americans as a fever-reducer and pain-reliever.

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Because the tractor hadn't seen the chicken.

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My grandfather slipped on a banana peel. I helped him up.

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Why did the pig cross the ocean? So he could be eaten by Americans.

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Who more attractive then you? No one your ugly as pooh.

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A black man and a white man were in a fight. Who won? I don't know. It was pay-per view and I didn't buy it.

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why did suzie fall of the swings? because she had no arms.

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There once was a man from Peru Whose limericks stopped at line two (I sense the public demanding an encore) There once was a man from Verdun There's also a limerick about Emperor Nero, but I can't tell it to you.

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Hi

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My grandma's star sign was cancer, and it was really ironic how she died, actually... She was attacked by a giant crab.

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a pornstar comes early to a party

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Yo mama so fat, she was diagnosed with Type 2 Diabetes and has been instructed by her physician to exercise and regularly monitor her blood glucose levels.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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