A duck walks up to a lemonade stand and says to the man nothing. Because It's a duck.

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What do you call a guy who acts straight but is really not? Verl.

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1 pack of bacon 2 fat guys. They both die fighting over it.

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? It really depends on the make and model of the car, as well as the relative size and weight of the people in question, but legally you can only have as many people in the car as there are seatbelts available for them.

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what did George Washington say to his men before crossing the Delaware river? Get in the boat.

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Situation: 2 cows eating grass on a warm Sunday night. Question: Why does 9+4=3 1/2? Answer: 69!

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What did the Jews say before they got of the bus? Let's make like a Jewish kid's forskin and get the hell out of here.

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LO LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOPLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOO O O O O O O OLO LOL OL O LO LO LO L OL O LO LO L OL O LO L OL O LO LO L OL OL O LO LO L OL OL OL O LO L OL OL O L OL OLLOLOLLOL OL O LO LO L OL OL O

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Whats the difference between a pizza and a Jew? Jews are people

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Billy: Hey Timmy, you're so fat your high school picture was an aerial photograph Timmy: Oh yeah? Well you're so fat when you tried to take that photograph the helicopter pilot told you to get out because you're too fat

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What's worse than the holocaust? Finding a worm in your apple.

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What did the cancer patient do during Willow Smith's "Whip My Hair"? -Nothing.

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whats red and looks like a bucket? a red bucket.

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What was the little boy doing in the deep end of the swimming pool? Drowning.

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Why did the blonde become a cannibal? Because she got hungry.

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what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

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47

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a man i knew who was a real jerk was about to drive home drunk. i was trying to stop him, but then he punched me in the face. i let him through. he died that night. i texted him all the way

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How could Jamie not come out and play? His mum had cancer

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You know what sucks? A vacuum.

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why did the computer monitor stop working? Becasue it has a date with a slice of cheese.

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Jacob loves stroking his gf's doodle every lunch break. He was embarrased cause it was bigger than his.

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where are you?

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Women's rights.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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