Why did the chicken cross the road? Well it all starts back in 1765. Sir clucks the 3rd, was the finest most brave chicken there was. No other chickens could even compare. Well you see Sir clucks, with all of his riches and wealth, was one of the most popular chickens of his time. Everyone knew of his vast fortunes. Unfortunately for sir clucks his fortune caused him great misfortunes. You see the dastardly Honey badger brothers heard of the Great Sir clucks and thought to themselves "Why does sir clucks get all the fame and fortune." With that being said the Three brothers came up with one of the most evil plans. They found sir clucks, walking through an alleyway in SHITBUTT city. They surrounded Sir clucks and beat him to the brink of death. They then threw a bag over his head and threw him in their windowless rape van. They then sped off in the night, taking sir clucks to their hideout out in the Dastardly Dry Desert. Not many days passed before the citizens of SHITBUTT city realized that their Most beloved Sir clucks had gone missing. Day,weeks months passed by, but to no avail. Finally, in the 4th month of sir clucks absence, the honey badger brothers sent mayor Monkeyman a ransom note explaining how they want 1 million in clean bills. Little did they know Sir clucks had been coming up with a plan of his own, as the days passed. Nightfall came and Sir clucks set his plan in motion. He had been working on getting his bindings loose and tonight was the night he would escape. "I don't feel so well" says sir clucks to one of the honey badger brothers that was on guard that night. "ehhh what seems to be the problem?" he opens sirclucks cage, not knowing he is a 7th level Black belt. BAM SMACK BONG and with that sir clucks moved quicker than a jack rabbit and ran out into the chill desert night. After hours of running and his feet bloody to the bone he came to a road. You know what happened next? He crossed that SHIT and lived happily ever after And that my amigos is the Factual true story of Sir clucks the 3rd.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the Koala Bear fall out of the tree? Because shortly before, it's life had ended due to lethal chlamydia, which is not uncommon for a Koala Bear these days. Due to it's loss of thought and therefore muscle control, it lost it's grip on the branch it was holding and naturally gravity took over.

thumb_up thumb_down

I grammer is gooder then yours.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

Why did John fall off the tree? We were throwing rocks at him.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

What's the difference between Santa Claus and Tiger Woods? Santa Claus is a fictional old man who flies around delivering gifts, while Tiger Woods is a professional golfer.

thumb_up thumb_down +28

nobody move! I've dropped my brain.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

how do you kill a blonde?? put a scratch n sniff on the bottom of a pool

thumb_up thumb_down -22

If a blonde and a brunette fell off a cliff who would reach the ground first? The blonde because she was fatter.

thumb_up thumb_down +39

Why was the black guy sitting in the back of the bus? Because there were no more seats available in the front.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why was Why added to why? Because WHy not.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Q: why did the plain crash A: because the driver was a loaf of bread

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A Finn, a Swede and A Norwegian went to an island. The Norwegian shot them all.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Q : What did the construction worker get for christmas? A: Nothing a building fell on him 3 days earlier

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What happened to the Mexican who commited suicide? He died.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

your mom is so fat that she had to start going to a gym to exercise and get her weight under control.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Your mom is so fat she weighs significantly higher then most females of her age and height.

thumb_up thumb_down

Did you hear about the pirate movie? It was rated PG-13 for sexual content/nudity, language, and some violence.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What did the black man say tovtye chinese man? Hello sir how are you today?

thumb_up thumb_down -8

did you hear about the guy who lost his left arm and left leg? hes all right now

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Q:What did the hillbilly say when he lost his tractor? A: Where is my tractor

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Why did the cat have hair? Because he did.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

- What's the difference between a gay man and a refrigerator? - The refrigerator doesn't fart when you take your meat out.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Why did the chicken successfully cross the road? It didn't in the middle of the street it got hit by a car.

thumb_up thumb_down -1

what goes woof ? A dog.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops