I had a really great joke to tell you!

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so your snowboarding in the dessert and all four of your tires pop. how many pancakes does it take to cover a dog house. the answer is B. 500 squids

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Whats pink and screaming? a skinned baby in a bucket of vinegar+

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How do you beat Andy Murry at tennis? KILL HIM!

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What do you callan african american in KFC? A had working american with a average profit, trying to make a living.

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What did Batman say to Superman? Nothing, he killed him with a kryptonite spear.

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My Japanese girlfriend left me the other day... I am now depressed and have resorted to comfort eating.

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How do you stop a baby flying 100mph? a shovel

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What do you call a woman in a kitchen ? There rightful place.

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What rhymes with Hitler? Walt Disney.

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Don't you hate it when someone starts a sentence and doesnt fi...

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't

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What was so incredible about this bigger new oven i just bought? It could fit twice as many Jews in it. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

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I used to think skyrim jokes were funny. Then I took an arrow to the knee.

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PATIENT: Doctor, doctor, I can't see my legs DOCTOR: That's because you're blind

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You have never had sex because.... Well, look in the mirror and you'll see for yourself -Matt

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Why was the little boy crying? His whole family died.

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Come In!

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A cat starts grooming itself How many sprinkles does it take to cover the moon Cabinet because whales live in water

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A married couple was in a terrible accident where the man’s face was severely burned. The doctor told the husband that they couldn’t graft any skin from his body because he was too skinny. So the wife offered to donate some of her own skin. However, the skin on her body that the doctor felt was suitable would have to come from her buttocks. The husband and wife agreed that they would tell no one about where the skin came from, and they requested that the doctor also honor their secret.

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What salad was served in the salad bar on the Titanic? Probably a selection of green leaves, radishes, cucumber, sliced hard boiled egg and cherry tomatoes, topped with cress, mixed seeds and a delicate dressing.

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Want to hear a joke? Womens' Rights

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Your muma is so ugly she went to a ugly competition and got kicked out "no pros aloud".

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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