One day, while a blonde was out driving her car, she ran into a truck. The truck's driver made her pull over into a parking lot and get out of the car. He took a piece of chalk and drew a circle on the pavement. He told her to stand in the middle and not leave the circle. Furious, he went over to her car and slashed the tires. The blonde got angry and called the cops, who proceeded to come and arrest him.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Who the hell is Femi Otedola?

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Why did the boy dig a hole in the football field? He was blind and his parents were being quite irresponsible....However someone should probably fill in that hole, as that could be a hazard during a football game.

thumb_up thumb_down +15

Q: What is the difference between a duck? A: That question doesn't make any sense.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Why did Johnny's pants fall down? Because he was fat.

thumb_up thumb_down -15

whats green and has wheels? a green tractor.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Why John isn't smiling? Becouse he died yesterday

thumb_up thumb_down -22

bill is either dead or alive. bill is not dead therefore bill is alive

thumb_up thumb_down +28

so a square said to another square,your rather obtuse oh wait squares cant talk,whats going on. later that day,chuckles realizes he isnt funny -chuckles

thumb_up thumb_down -30

Why did the man buy a large butcher knife and a shot gun at 3am while his family was asleep at home? because he suffered from insomnia and figured running some errands would give him something to do. his wife had also been telling him that their current knife was getting old and rather dull and since one of his favorite hobbies was duck hunting he decided it wouldn't hurt to buy a new gun considering it was on sale for a reasonable price

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Yo mama is so poor she used the welfare system and is a family of 4 and has a successful business now

thumb_up thumb_down -51

An eagle and a mouse sat on a tree branch, watching a farmer walk to the pasture to milk his cows. The eagle then turned to the mouse but said nothing, because eagles cannot speak. The eagle then ate the mouse because it was a bird of prey.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Roses are red, Violets are blue Oh, that's good to know.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Three nuns accidentally walked in to a bar and so they immediately went out.

thumb_up thumb_down -54

What do you call a black man in court? A lawyer.

thumb_up thumb_down +61

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because I shot him. Why did the other monkey fall out of the tree? Because his tail was stapled to the other monkey.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the chicken cross the dairy farm? Sex.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Why is the average lifespan of Black men in the U.S. only about 52? Hundreds of years of oppression and a lack of nutritional, liberal, and vocational education have put them in a position where gathering the resources necessary to live a healthy and safe life are greatly is incredibly difficult.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

The Irish man was sober.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

There is a asian, mexican and a blonde boy at school. Every day they each get the same food for lunch. The asian always got noodles. The mexican a taco. the blonde boy got pb and j. They decide if they get this lunch again, they will jump off a cliff. The next day they get the same lunch and jump off a cliff. At their funeral the asian mom says " if i had known, i would have made her sushi." the mexican mom says " i would have made her a burrito." The blonde's dad say "hey don't look at me, he makes his own lunch."

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What a gay guy get on his IQ test? 69

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Whats blue, fuzzy and has little red dots all over? Beats me...

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the black man go to the store? To get milk and eggs because he was running out of those items

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A dog walks into a bar. A patron checks its tags and promptly calls the owner.

thumb_up thumb_down +34

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops