Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have amnesia! Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have amnesia! Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have amnesia! Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have amnesia......

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock? Whos there? Not Sally...

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What's white and can't climb trees? Yogurt

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Knock Knock ! Who's there? Jim. Oh come in.

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The kid wakes up in the middle of the night to get some water. But over hears sounds from his parents room. he looks through the keyhole. Then he comtinues walking and says. "Why does mom say i cant suck things?"

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What do you call a group of geese? A giggle

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A POW is sitting in his cell when the guard walks up to him. He says "You may choose one of these tortures, drowning or listening to Rebecca Black." The POW chose Rebecca Black, for even though he disliked her music, it was much better than getting drowned

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Invisible Children Foundation.

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- My grand mother died. - I'm sorry.... Did She died of old age ? - No, she got eaten by a giant worm.

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What has two leg, but cant walk? A paraplegic.

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There's a pile of dead babies with one live baby on the bottem eating it's way out.

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Life is an elephant, get married.

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Q: How many leprechauns does it take to screw in a light bulb? A: Leprechauns aren't real.

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Why did Lady Gaga arrive at the Grammy's in an egg? Because she was born that way.

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A man walks into a bar. He says ow

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How many pancakes can you fit into a gopher hole? Red - because ice cream doesn't have any bones.

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if quizzes are quizzical, then what are tests? testicle

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Who smells like urine and his da is a registered sex offender with madeline mccann in his house? Aodhan hearty, May I also include he looks like a bug. Oh and don't forget the rot on his teeth, it is fucking disgusting. It really looks like he hasn't brushed his teeth in quite a substantial period of time, in my opinion, he is the only person who is actually comparible to sean.

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why did the monkey fall out of the tree? because it was dead. why did the frog fall out of the tree? because it was stapled to the monkey,

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Why did the little girl pull her hair out? She didn't, It's a side-effect of the chemotherapy.

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Why did the woman have an abortion? Because she was raped at the age of 17.

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Why did the man smoke pot in the roller coaster? Because he was dyslexic and read the sign wrong and thought it read "You must be high to go on this ride."

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What do you call a Mexican in a kitchen? A chef.

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Why did the dog smile? It didn't. Humans are the only creatures on planet Earth capable of smiling, therefore, dogs are unable to smile.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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