Patient: Doctor Doctor! Doctor: Yes. Patient: I think I'm a moth! Doctor: You don't need a doctor, you need Mental help. Patient: Yes I know. Doctor: Then why are you here? Patient: The light was on.

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Why did Jill fall off the swings? -Because she had no arms. Knock Knock? --Who's there? Not Jill. What did Jill get for Christmas? -What? I don't know. She couldn't open it.

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Why did little Susie fall off the swing? Because she fell out the window and landed in soot.

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What do you call women playing the sport of lacrosse? I dont think it matters because Women's Lacrosse isn't a sport.

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Why did the boat sink? It ran into an iceberg.

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what's white on top and black on the bottom? Society

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Q: What's worse than a pile of dead babies? A: The live one at the bottom trying to eat his way out. Q: What's worse than that? A: When he comes back for more.

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Whats worse than purple nurples? Having the period

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A man is cheating on his wife. His wife finds out and is instantly distressed and begins to cry.

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A drunk guy walks out of an AA meeting.

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A duck walks up to a lemonade stand and he said to the man running the stand, "Hey! Got any grapes?" The man then realized he was hallucinating because ducks are unable to speak proper english.

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A bus with 12 black guys is driven off a cliff. What is the sad part of this story? ... Our beloved president was not involved.

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Yes!

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you will die someday

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How do you have sex with an amputee? stick it in the eyes

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Knock knock. Who's there? Ben. Oh hi! come in.

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You have never had sex because.... Well, look in the mirror and you'll see for yourself -Matt

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If a picture is worth a thousand words, what is a video worth?

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Why didnt sally throw out her lunch? Her mom had a miscarriage, she was never born.

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The man was so nice It's too bad he couldn't hear the bus coming.

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Q. What do you call a small hen that can't lay eggs properly? A. A small hen that can't lay eggs properly.

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What's worse than the Holocaust? Nothing, shit went down so bad.

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a fish swimming in the water swims

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Your momma's so fat that when she uses a hoolahoop, she gets tired after one try and has to stop.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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