i was raised in a bad family. i was the youngest and i was abused then i died three years back. then i died again and then i died again then i died again then again then i LIVED but then i died again then i died again then i died again then i died again

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What do you call two Japanese men digging through rubble? Worried family members of missing relatives due to the recent devastating tragedy in the island nation of Japan.

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How did Sarah Offet win? He had no arms. Knock, knock? Whose there? Not Sarah Offet

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Why the long face? My face isn't long, it's the same shape as everyone else, retard. I meant why are you sad. I'm not sad.

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Do the Helen Keller... become mute, deaf, and blind.

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What did one butthole say to the other butthole? I'm actually not sure. I wasn't there when he said it.

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What do you call an Islamic man fling a plane? A very frightened passenger who took over flying the plane when the pilot collapsed due to a heart attack

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How did the little boy survive the massacre? He didn't. How did the little girl survive the massacre? She was the killer.

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What do you get when you cross a dog and a cat? A hybrid animal that can never exist to do each species own genetic make-up which would subsequently reject the other's. I.E. The cat would reject the dog sperm from ever fertilizing and the dog would reject cat sperm.

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What do you call cheese that's mine? My cheese

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A white man and a black man play a game of basketball, who wins? It depends who's better

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Knock knock. Who's there? I am. I am who? I am pregnant.

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How does a Chinese person wear a contact lens? On a 45 degree angle

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A paralyzed person walks into a bar.

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What happens when you fire a machine gun clip into a jew? You are convicted on first degree murder, and most likely sentenced to jail because you can't afford a good lawyer. Orange jumpsuits are uncomfortable.

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Why are black people so fast? They probably practice.

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You know what they say about men with large feet? Large shoes.

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I have Alzheimer. What?

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How did little Timmy die? He was ripped to shreds by a violent badger.

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whats better than sex with a 12 year old?? nothing

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What did the little boy become for Halloween? An orphan, his parents were killed that day.

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"I want a boyfriend for these cold winter nights" ... Shut up you slut go buy a blanket.

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Whats is pathetic and just plain sad? Gas prices these days.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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