What's worse than rotten eggs? Being dead.

Q: How do you fit 30 Jews in one car? A: Two in the front, two in the back, and the rest in the ash tray.

So a girl says "I want to be a banana when I grow up". She's set unrealistic goals and her parents fear she may be autistic.

What did the facial stylist charge Jack Sparrow to get his ears pierced? A buc-an-ear!

Your momma so stupid that it's really inspiring she managed to overcome her limitations and raise such a wonderful family.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, Where is the bathroom, I need to go poo.

What did the cow say to the chicken? Moo

What did a tampon say to the other tampon? Nothing, they were both stuck up bitches.

why did the plane crash? the pilot was a loaf of bread.

What do you call a guy with a car on his head? Immediate identification would not be possible. The man would be referred to by his estimated demographics. Circumstantial evidence and dental reports may be required for identification at which points the family's would be notified. Only after this will the man's name would be released to the media who would in turn report this.

Please don't tell anybody about me, or I will be hunted down, taken from my family, and be objected to a life of cruel exploitation.

Whu did the boy drop his cheeseburger? Because the school janitor whacked him with a mallet.

Roses are red my shirt is blue don't take my money, their not for u -_-

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I hate you so suck on poo.

How do you torture Helen Keller? Give her a cheese-grater and tell her it's a book.

why did the one handed man cross the road? to get to the secondhand shop.

What do you call a Mexican playing basketball? A man of hispanic heritage that enjoys the sport of basketball.

I'm not here.

Doctor, Doctor. I feel like a pair of curtains! That's the least of your problems. You've got AIDS.

I really don't care how you dress at my funeral, I'll be dead!

Why didn't Sebastian get out of the forest? Because he got brutally murdered by a big bad wolf

An American, a Mexican, and a Chinese person are in an airplane. The three of them ponder throwing someone out for a racist reason, but decide to fly to the destination.

What do you get when you cross a rabbit and a pair of scissors? Nothing. That's not possible with current technology.

A man name Bill works 12 hours a day at a warehouse, almost everyday a week. It is a hard job but Bill does it to support his beautiful wife of many years. Bill thinks the long hard days are worth every moment he gets to spend with her. One night, after a hard day, he comes home to find another man in bed with his wife. Bill begins to sob and yell "I work 12 hours a day at a warehouse....." His wife yells back. "We already read this part, get to the punchline".

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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