Romney 2012

why did the banana go to the doctor? answer: he wasnt peeling well lollolololloololololololololololololooolololololololol i just fell of my dinosaur

Shotest joke ever... Your dick.

What do you call a dude dinosaur that's into other dude dinosaurs? A Bi-ceritops

What's worse than eating an apple with aids? Loosing your virginity to the seven chosen ones.

What did the scuba diver say to his partner when he got stuck in some seaweed. Something that sort of sounded like glug, or maybe blub, or some other sound you would hear trying to talk underwater.

I AM SHOWERING IN THE BLOOD AND ORGANS OF ENDORPHIN RUSH IN ORDER TO APPEASE THE GODS KNOWN AS... ME, MYSELF, AND I!

What's the difference between a blonde and a carrot? One's a human, the other's a vegetable.

Yo mamma is so dumb, she bought a Wii and was satisfied with her purchase

Your mother is so morbidly obese that she greatly exceeds the necessary recommended serving sizes of each meal.

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She was deaf and blind.

Your mother is so fat, that recent test results have proved she is morbidly obese.

What did the snake say to the rat?

I have a phone, Don't know where it's at, Forever Alone FAPFAPFAP

How do you get four gay guys on a bar stool? With teamwork and coordination, each could place one foot on the seat, and they can all stand up using each other for balance and support. The fact that they are gay is irrelevant.

What did the boy say when he got hit by a car? Nothing, he punctured his lungs.

Hey I just meet you And this is crazy I took bath salts Your face looks tasty

Me: Hey, Johnny! Do you see that Tree? Johnny: No. Me: Neither do I.

Kanye West walks into a bar. As he is a very popular celebrity, he is recognized instantly. The patrons mob him, asking for pictures and autographs. He is in a pleasant humour that evening, so he indulges them. Some laughs are had, he buys lots of drinks, and takes home two beautiful women. Such is the life of a celebrity. ...but that still doesn't make him happy.

What's the differrence between a park bench and a black person... A park bench can support a family

How do you kill a blonde? I don't. Murder is a crime.

What do you call an elderly women who after the death of her late husband had many enconters witb men? A whore.

Nero, please pick up the phone, I wont ever do that, it was a mistake okay? Stop that, my sister wont ever! My mom whatever! But if you lie a finger on my sister, I will kill you, I am at the outside, which room are you at? Tell me you coward fucker! Tell me!

Why did the chicken cross the road? To go fishing.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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