What did one dog say to the other dog? Bark.

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Why did the women call 911 on her 12 year old son? Because he was schizophrenic and attempting to commit suicide by hanging himself.

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His Royal Highness was hunting in the forest accompanied by his squires and hunting dogs. A man, screaming, ran wildly out of the brush and addressed the hunting party. He said, "DON'T SHOOT! I AM NOT A MOOSE!! PLEASE DO NOT SHOOT!!!!" The king calmly raised his rifle to his eye and fired, hitting the man in the temple, and instantly killing him. A squire frantically turned to the king and said "Sire! Why did you kill this man?! He CLEARLY said he was not a moose!" The King replied "Oh! I thought he said he WAS a moose..."

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What did the gravel say to the road? Give me the D.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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Why couldn't the man open his car door for the women? He drove a jeep with removable doors

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Freddie Mercury died of AIDS. Many consider him a musical hero.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to your house! Nock. Nock. Whos there? The Chicken?

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How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? Just one.It is a very simple task for somebody who knows what to do.

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What does Snoop Dogg eat when he's sick? Chicken Noodle Snoop.

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what do you call an arse bandit? lady gaga's tanning salon attendants 3rd cousins dog chauffeur, roberto

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Bob: "Did you eat my sandwich?" Alex: "I am your sandwich."

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Why was the little boy crying? His whole family died.

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Pitbull is Mr. Worldwide because his music sucks everywhere in the world

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Guy 1: Hey look under there Guy 2: Under what inanimate object that is physically visible and made up of atoms

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A guy walks into a bar and says "hey can I get a strong drink" and the bartender says "no we don't allow blacks in this bar" and he was then pushed to the ground and thrown out.

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How do you make a person cry? Burn his family.

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How do you make a clown cry? Hit him with a chair then rape his children

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no

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What has a black, blue, and red all over? Timmy. He was mugged, and vigorously raped.

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what do you get if you cross a scotsman , who knows nothing about football and a indian? Blackburn rovers, and a good night out

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A black man and a Mexican man are both in a car. Who's driving? The white man who is also in the car with them.

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(Insert short question here) (Insert long semi-irrelevant answer here)

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what do you get when you have unprotected sex with a hooker? an orgasm

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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