Why did the boy drop his ice cream? Because it slipped from his hand.

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I don't want to hear another joke about female hygiene, PERIOD! -Lets go Mets

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A Jew, a Christian and a Muslim are on a plane to France. When they arrive in Paris one will go visit a friend who recently found inspiration in the many magical streets of the city and is in the middle of a year abroad. Another will search for a job and home to support himself and any future family that he might choose to have in the future. The last will check into a hotel and proceed to have a wonderful time seeing all the sights that Paris has to offer.

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Why can't Anne Frank drive? Because she's dead.

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How do you make a plumber sad? You kill his family!

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A dyslexic blind man

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How do you make a baby cry? You throw a brick at its face.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, I was asking you.

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Knock knock whos there Ewan Gudgeon *Shoots Himself cause cannot live with hearing tht name*

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I always used bra`s so I guess you know, nice I guess. Can you please stop it? I like know I am telling but my mind wont like accept it, and I would just like to shut off the laptop, but I want to keep chatting with you for just a bit more.

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A black man, an arabic man, and a hispanic man are all in a car, who is driving? The black man.

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Knock knock. Whose there? Not my house so not my problem. Frankly, I don't give a shit.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't it got hit by a speeding moped.

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Darkness Falls Across The Land The Midnite Hour Is Close At Hand Creatures Crawl In Search Of Blood To Terrorize Y'awl's Neighbourhood And Whosoever Shall Be Found Without The Soul For Getting Down Must Stand And Face The Hounds Of Hell And Rot Inside A Corpse's Shell The Foulest Stench Is In The Air The Funk Of Forty Thousand Years And Grizzy Ghouls From Every Tomb Are Closing In To Seal Your Doom And Though You Fight To Stay Alive Your Body Starts To Shiver For No Mere Mortal Can Resist The Evil Of The Thriller

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A woman walked out of the kitchen.

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A man is riding down the road on his horse, Sally. He happens to see a horse without a rider, but with two saddles. He finds this peculiar, continues into town, and has a fine day.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped by a giant scorpion. What's worse than getting raped by a giant scorpion? Getting raped by two giant scorpions

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Why did priences Dian cross the street? Cause she wasn't wearing a seatbelt!!

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what has a hard shaft and an even harder head? A hammer

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A horse walked into a bar, the bartender asked "Why the long face?" The horse did not reply, as it was a horse and did not speak English nor understand what the man had said, the horse then stumbled around the bar for a while, confused, before finding the exit and leaving.

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Have you heard that joke about Helen Keller? No. Neither has she.

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Q: Why did James cry? A: Because he's an infant and still quite afraid of his surroundings

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What do you get when two black men walk into a bar? A few salesmen celebrating their recent pay raise.

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Your mother's so fat that when she goes through rotating doors, the doors rotate around her.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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