What's the difference between John Candy and Chris Farley? Nothing. They're both dead.

Doctor Doctor, I feel like a pair of curtains! Really? Well that's the least of your problems. Your test came up HIV positive.

How many dead babies can you fit in the trunk of a car? Depends on the car.

A shark walks into a bar. The bartender asks someone to call animal control to remove the nearly-dead sea creature from his bar.

What did the black guy say to the other black guy? We are both black

Whats the difference between a pizza and your mom? Your mom's a bitch.

PerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerúPerú

¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯¯ ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------ _________________________________________ That's a road. Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the idiot that made this joke, me. And what did the idiot do? He ate it with barley. There was food poisoning. Where did the idiot's vomit go? In yo poo.

Why was the little girl crying? She got raped by a giant scorpion.

What's the hardest part of walking through a pile of dead babies? My penis.

Your mama is so fat, we are all seriously concerned about her health.

little potato when born allicator don't have neck, if u like me it's cause u stole my scooter

Roses are Blue Violets are red, I need to go the the bathroom

What did the fruit say when it was about to be sliced in half? Nothing, fruits cannot talk, duh.

Why did the blonde's parents take away her car? She didn't pay for half the insurance like she said she would.

A Christian, a Jew, and a Hindu walked into a bar - guess what happened then? Well two of them are alcoholics so they wisely changed their minds and left, then the other one got bored so he left too.

Why will this joke be the most hated? Because it sucks

Why did the boy cry after baseball practice? He was molested by his coach.

A rabbi, a priest, and a minister walk into a bar. Unfortunately, the bar was closed due to the poor economy. Luckily there was an Applebee's across the street and they were able to save money with half-priced appetizers.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 6 was racist.

Why can't penguins fly? ......It is against their evolutionary state.

what's wrong on so many levels? wrong wrong wrong wrong

Q: What's small, round, and looks like a marble? A: A marble.

Ben Affleck

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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