If life gives you lemons, you can't really make anything because you lack the proper materials.

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Moral: Sure, your number is the one that ends with 853 right? Do not reply if I am right. Moral2: BECAUSE TOP COMMENT... AND SERIOUSLY, THAT NUMBER BETTER END WITH 69 AFTER I CALL YOU! DO NOT REPLY

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Why are you reading this joke? There is this nice 'Bad Idea T-Shirts' ad right there.

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http://www.google.com/imgres?q=harry+styles+funny&hl=en&safe=active&biw=1024&bih=398&gbv=2&tbm=isch&tbnid=lc8_fNCatYHOqM:&imgrefurl=http://www.vervegirl.com/harry-being-typical-harry/&docid=86Gw8eNJ73tOYM&imgurl=http://www.vervegirl.com/cms/wp-content/uploads/2012/05/harry-styles-300.jpg&w=300&h=400&ei=q4vHT9XwHYL48gSJoJzJDw&zoom=1

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How do you make a hobo cry? You steal his trash.

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What did the elephant say to the whale? Nothing, neither can talk and they live in very different biomes.

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Chocolate makes everything better, except obesity.

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whats the differnce between a corvette and a pile of dead babies??? i dont have a corvette in my garage.

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Q: A black man is walking down the street with a television, where did he just come from? A: Best Buy, he just got a bonus, and wanted to reward himself.

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What's better than ice cream? Anal sex

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Q: What do you get when you cross Marvel and Capcom? A: Marvel vs. Capcom.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was being raped by a giant scorpion

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Why did the egg crossed the road? If X = chicken and C = the speed of light, then 2 to the power of the road which is 12 feet across times X/C = egg

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What happened to the old man at his suprise party? He died from the shock.

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Maturity is a virtue.

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What has 4 legs and doesn't bark? A dead dog.

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What did the little boy with a terminal illness get for Christmas? A gun

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Q: Why was six afraid of seven? A: Because of Kevin Spacey's chilling performance.

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:Knock Knock :Don't be stupid there's no door here.

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How did the comedian end his show with a bang? He shot 4 people in the audience. It was a horrible sight and the remainder of the people in the audience were scarred for life.

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What did Jamaal say when he was in Walmart? I'm Jamaal and I'm in Walmart.

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What is the easiest method of making multiple women fall head over heels? Have a wingman help you raise a rope at the start of a women's running race.

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A man spots Bill Murray at a restaurant in Los Angeles. He proceeds to tell his friends the story, who in turn believe him, as the story is plausible.

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If a man dies in China, Does anybody care?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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