why did the monkey fall out of the tree? it was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Girls Basketball.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

How do you make a baby cry? You throw a brick at its face.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

What would you call Kenny Dalgleish if he was black? Mr Dalgleish in a formal setting, Kenny in an informal one.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did suzie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock - who's there? Bob -bob who.... Bobs knocking for suzie!

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Q: Why did the prostitute have no arms? A: Because she was an amputee.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

i saw your mom, i said hi

thumb_up thumb_down -13

SCP-009-J is missing. Where has it gone? Is it under the table? Was it sat upon? Is it there on the ceiling? Is it under the rug? Was it gobbled right up by a quantum pillbug? Did it run through the tunnel? Did it fall down the stair? Was it sent back in time to a carnival fair? Did it get on a train to a far-away place? Is it locked in a falsified beacon from space? Did it fall in the oobleck and [DATA EXPUNGED]? If it clogged up the sink, will it have to be plunged? Just where has SCP-009-J gotten to? Oh wait, that's right! SCP-009-J is you!

thumb_up thumb_down -5

Where did the little girl go when the bomb went off? Everywhere

thumb_up thumb_down +15

What's worse than Monkey Ball? Super Monkey Ball. What's worse than Super Monkey Ball? The Holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Reilly and Ross went up to fetch a pale of water when a triceratops turned them into bagels then ate them and later crapped them out....

thumb_up thumb_down -20

Roses are yellow Daisies are purple Tv drinks yes Why swing the door

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What's worse that pooping in your pants having someone see it

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why are white people not good at basketball? Because they aren't black.

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact? Some men are blind.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

Micheal Jackson walks into a bar?

thumb_up thumb_down +3

How to you kill two birds with one stone? You use a precision hunting rifle to mortally wound two flying birds, then put them on a platform and break their skulls with one rock. Separately.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

What did jimmy say when his brother had been mean to him all day and he was about to get a straw and his brother took the last one? That was the last straw!

thumb_up thumb_down +11

why did billy drop his ice cream? he got hit by a plane that a loaf of bread was driving

thumb_up thumb_down -11

26 because if 25 is funnier than 24, 26 should be even funnier right?

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What did the Muslim do after his friend told him a funny joke ? Laugh.

thumb_up thumb_down +41

what is the awesomest of them all? me

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What do you call a black guy in space? An astronaut

thumb_up thumb_down +40

what sits in the corner of a room and gets smaller and smaller? a baby combing its hair with a potato peeler

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops