Why was the kid mad? Because he died.

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What do you call a person without a heart? Not alive.

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Roses are gray, violets are gray. I am a dog.

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What happened to the boy that got hit by a bus? He was by a 2nd bus, by which he felt no pain because the first bus crushed his lungs and skull causing suffocation and profuse hemorraging.

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Whats funny about a blonde, brunette and red-head stranded on an island? Nothing. They are in a very dangerous survival situation, which could prove to be fatal

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Why was Cinderella so bad at ball? Isn't that sexist, making assumptions about Cinderella's sports capability when you have never seen her play sports before (because she is a fictional character) and then asking why this is true when you have no proof that it is in fact true? But I would guess the correct answer is (if she is bad at ball in the first place) that she never played ball before. Think about it. Why did you have to ask this question at all? Isn't it obvious?

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How do you make a fireman cry??? Kill His Family

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Jesse gets so many ladies

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Q: what's red and blue and covered in piss? A: everything. I'm so sorry.

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Every 60 seconds in Africa, a Minute passes.

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Why did the black guy cross the street? Because his master ordered him to

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A man violently rapes a small child. Unfortunately the child has aids and gives them to the man.

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Why did little Lucy climb up a tree? Cos her dad beats her.

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Why'd the gay man get fired from the sperm bank? He was repeatedly late to work.

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What's funny about a blond, a brunette, and a red-head, drunk in a Cadillac? Everyone knows integration is a myth.

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What did Aladin say to Mulan? Nothing. Although they are both Disney characters, they never appear in the same film, and therefore never communicate.

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You will never see the a heaven made of pure light with no room for darkness to dwell? Pure light will make you blind, living forever in darkness.

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I'm on a see food diet- it consists of fish and molluscs. sea*

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What did the plane say after it flew into the World Trade Center on 9/11 Nothing, planes are incapable of speaking.

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What do a fish and a bird have in common? They both live under water. Apart from the bird.

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DAVID.B YOU O ES 2 BAR YA TRAMP

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the battle of waterloo

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Sickman Fraud, cocaine snorting alshole... "Oh yeah mommy I love raping you so much... What where are you? This cocaine is really bad quality man! The effect was so short..." Your friendly r*pist neighborhood Moral Man: "Because since when do you really need cocaine... ...In order to rape your mother?"

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anti jokes are gay...your all gay

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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