A mushroom walked into a bar. The bartender says, "We don't serve your kind here." The mushroom said, "What? I'm a fungi." The bartender said, "Exactly. It's a health hazard. I already have two strikes and if I lose the bar my wife will divorce me."

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Roses are red Violets are blue Im bad at rhyming Refridgerator

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How many Jews can you fit in a car? It really depends on the make and model of the car, as well as the relative size and weight of the people in question, but legally you can only have as many people in the car as there are seatbelts available for them.

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I hate it when sentences don't end the way you expect them potato.

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roses are red violets are blue i bribed a hobo to eat my poopoo

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How Many Women Does It Take To Parallel Park A Car ? Zero , The Husband Drove

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Knock, knock. Come in!

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two snow men standing in a field and one says to the other can you smell carrots

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A man walked into a bar. He stayed for a bit and had a good time.

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What is faster than a black man with a stereo? A car

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Why do Jews have such big noses? They don't; To suggest phenotypic variation along religious lines is preposterous.

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I love you Itachi Uchiha, please let me lick ice cream off of your body and oh crap you're an anime character and not real never mind

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What do you call a pencil made entirely of steel? I dont know, i dont name my pencils.

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How do you get a blonde to tell time? By asking her what time is it.

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if one legs christmas and the other is new years then you have a rare desease call holidaylegtosisisisisis

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saw a free cat yesterday...it was dead on the side of the road

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why did the baby fall down the steps? Because there was big earth quake that blocked his parents on the other side of the house, therefor leaving no one capable of getting to him befor falling

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whats wosre than stubbing your toe? being lost on a desert island being raped

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Why are people so quiet at golf game? Because its such a boring sport.

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Why do Indian people smell like curry? They don't. Its an ignorant misconception.

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What do you get when you mix carbonated water, caramel color, aspartame, phosporic acid, potassium benzoate, caffeine, citric acid, and natural flavor? Diet Pepsi

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What did the white guy say to the Mexican when he entered the US? How was your flight?

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if got a joke if fogot it

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Q: Whats worse that 10 dead babies in a trash can? A: 1 dead baby in 10 trash cans.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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