Zombies eat brains! (You're safe)

Who the hell is Femi Otedola?

Why can't you tell jokes in Base 8? Because 7, 10, 11

I like my kids how i like my coffee I dont like coffee

Do you have to make frequent trips to the bathroom? Do you have a weak or broken stream? Do you leave the bathroom feeling satisfied? Do your frequent trips to the bathroom interrupt everyday activities? Well you should take Lunesta and just sleep. Then you wouldn't have this problem.

Chuck Norris was once approached by a woman for whom he had to fight a man to obtain all while doing a mundane activity in an unorthodox manner. He promptly declined for he is married and told the man he only fights for self-defense. He proceeded to put his pants on one leg at a time like everybody else.

Your Mother's breasts sag with such severity that the late, great surrealist artist Salvador Dali mistook them for clocks.

Knock, Knock Open the fucking Door

A jew, a catholic and an atheist are in the desert. They see a dusty lamp. They take it and rub it. Once the lamp is clean, they put it back on the sand and kep walking.

why did the monkey fall out of the tree? HE WAS DEAD STUPID IDIOT.

A man walks into a doctor's office and says "Doctor, it hurts when I poke my leg like this!" The doctor replies "That because there's a knife in your hand."

What is black white and red all over A tree in black, white, and red paint.

Who livs in a pineaple under the sea? Lots of mold and bacteria

Wade's the father

What did the White guy say to the Black Guy? "Hey, what's up?"

Why couldn't the kitten drink from its water bowl? Its face was stapled to the floor.

Yo Momma is so fat, she often chooses to take the elevator instead of the stairs.

Why do giraffes have long necks? To connect their bodies to their heads.

Why was the cat unable to drink its milk? He was stapled to the wall

How do you get a one armed man out of a tree? you throw a fridge at him

Why did the asian man crash? He fell asleep after a long 18 hour day of driving, plus he was listening to soothing soul music.

There once was a man from Nantucket who secluded himself from the outside world because of a tragic event that happened to him as a child.

Why was i said when 4 black people in a cadillac fell over a cliff. The car blew up...

Lebron James in the 4th quarter.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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