How many chickens does it take for a cow to count on Tuesday? The same reason a horse got fired for seven plus one blue red green.

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What did the tooth brush say to the toothe paste? Minorities.

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What's the difference between a McDonald's and Michael Jackson? One is a fast FOOD restaurant, while the other likes having sex with little boys.

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Why was the little girl not allowed to see the pirate movie? It was sold out.

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A man walks into a bar. While he sits on a barstool, a man greets him politely, and they proceed with light conversation.

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What do you call a one-armed man Whatever his name is

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What is red and itchy? Something that itches and it turns red if you itch it to much

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What's green, red, and goes fifty miles an hour? A frog in a blender.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 had bullied 6 and his old pal 21 back in his younger days.

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Guy 1: When your Justin Beiber af. Guy 2: What Guy 1: Do you mean

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John Cena for president

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What do you call a Black guy picking cottnon? A cottonpicker

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Whats the difference between Justin Bieber and Elton John? They're both gay.

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What did the elephant say to the pelican? He didn't say anything. I lied.

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What did the doctor say to the female car crash victim? Nothing she was dead when he walked in the room.

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Why do Asian men love noodles? Noodles are delicious!

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How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could Chuck Norris? All of it.

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why did the chicken cross the road because he wanted AIDS

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Why was was a black guy carrying a tv out of someone else's house. He was helping them move.

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What do you call a cow lying on a barn floor? A cow

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Why did the squirrel cross the... *Squash*

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A duck walks into a convient store and ask the cashier, "You got any bread?". The cashier immediatley responds, "No sorry, we don't sell bread." The next day the duck comes back and asks the same cashier, "You got any bread?" The cashier sighs and responds, "No, we still have no bread." After browsing for about three minutes the duck comes back and asks, "You have any bread?" The cashier, as pissed off as a beached whale, says, "NO! WE WILL NEVER GET ANY FRICKEN BREAD AND IF YOU ASK AGAIN I'LL NAIL YOUR BEAK TO THIS COUNTER!" The duck sways his head and looks to the ground, only to look right back at the cashier and ask, "You got any nails." The cashier says, "No." The duck comes back and says, "You got any bread?"

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What is the difference between a Jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't make for a very good accountant.

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Why was the boy un-able to talk He was retarded

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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