where do you find a dog with no legs? Korea. It's customary for the guests to get the drumsticks.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Why does Michael j. Fox make the best milkshakes? He uses the finest ingredients

thumb_up thumb_down -8

how do you make a baby cry? You throw a brick at it's face

thumb_up thumb_down +8

Why did the woman leave the kitchen? She had just prepared her breakfast and was late for her full-time job as a firefighter.

thumb_up thumb_down +1,595

Why did the plane leave late? Because they were out of Kellogg's® Breakfast Cereal.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Put chromosomes in advertising. Because you know, Sex Cells

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Gas prices are so high, I've had to resort to walking and riding my bike.

thumb_up thumb_down -17

there were ten in the bed and the little one said roll over so they all rolled over and one fell out then got back up and punched the little one in the face saying good night

thumb_up thumb_down +26

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 has been sexually abusing 6 for all his life

thumb_up thumb_down +39

One man's trash is another dyslexic man's shart.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

What word starts with "N" and ends with "R" that you never want to call a black person? ni**er

thumb_up thumb_down -774

what do you get when you put a baby in a blender? salsa how to you get it out? tostitos

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What did the red-haired barber say to the father who abandoned him at birth? Nothing. The father sat to the side and read a magazine as the barber cut the hair of his legitimate child, failing to recognize the irony of the situation.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

Why did the man ask his wife to make him a sandwich? He lost both of his arms in the war.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Your dad is so fat, that eventually he got on Biggest Loser and ended living a very successful life.

thumb_up thumb_down -12

What did the hobo get for Christmas? hypothermia.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Roses are red, Violets are blue I suck at poetry, Show me your tits

thumb_up thumb_down -10

What did one cat say to another? Cats cant talk

thumb_up thumb_down -13

Why did the chicken cross the road? It has been this way for two days now. Whenever he looks over his shoulder and past his wing, he can see them there. Following him. The men with the red eyes. He doesn't know what they want and doesn't want to find out. He crosses that road as he has crossed so many others recently, squawking and shuffling along on his stubby legs, darting through traffic in a risky effort to shake them off of his tailfeathers. He gets to the other side and ascends the curb, walking beak-first into a pair of legs hidden beneath a grey robe. He looks up and sees a pair of eyes like burning coals staring down at him from within the darkness of a hood. He tries to run, but it is too late. He has been taken. His wings and fingers are forfeit.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

what did the kid with poleo get for christmas. whatever he has on his christmas list because his parents feel bad for passing down the genetic information(DNA) that gave him poleo.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

thumb_up thumb_down -21

What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Someone else's cheese.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Yo mama's so fat, she's at risk for a number of obesity related disseases, including diabetes, hypertension, and heart dissease.

thumb_up thumb_down -19

What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for his birthday? A basketball.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops