What happened when the irishman left the bar? he didnt

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What do you get when you put a pig in an oven? A dead pig.

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yo mama is so fat she has more rolls than basken robins does flavors

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I nicknamed my diick "the truth" because the biitches can't handle it

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What is in the center of our galaxy? Some stars, space, and nebula.

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what happens when a retard hits an iceberg with a gigantic boat? 1517 people die.

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There are 11 people hanging onto a rope that comes down from an airplane. 10 of them are blonde, and one is a brunette. They all decide that one person should get off because if they don't, the rope will break and everyone will die. No one can decide who should go, so finally the brunette delivers a very touching speech, ending with the words, "I'll get off." The blondes, all moved by the brunette's speech, start clapping. Problem solved.

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If rocks were people, what would you call a bunch of marble rolling down a hill? Rocks don't have the ability to be people.

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Who is Dank? A: Billal

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roses are red violets are blue i've got alzheimer's ...

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FAMOUS DUDE:SWAG! Thank you, thank yo- HEY NO FLASH PHOTOGRAPHY, NO YOU CANT HAVE MY-KABOOM AUDIENCE: . . . YAY CLAP CLAP CLAP.

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How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way.

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How do you make a mailman cry? Kill his family.

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1,000 americans jump off a plane. They all die as a result of not having parachutes.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? There was food there.

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Have you ever tried ethiopian food? No. Neither have they

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Your mama's so fat her patronus is a cake

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because goats lay eggs.

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what happens when a hamster bites your arm? your arm bleeds

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Q: What do you call an underground train full of professors? A: It's very unlikely that the passengers on an underground train would consist entirely of professors, unless it was a special service booked solely for the attendees of highly specialised lectures which required each audience member to have completed a professorship.

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whats worse than being ugly? being aivy.

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ur gey

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What do you call a lord of the rings poster with nothing on it? A piece of paper

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock, knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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