Q.How do you get a dog to meow ? A. Put the dog in the freezer overnight . . Get a chainsaw and run it along his back in the morning . " Meowrrrr..."

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Ever heard of the dumb blonde joke? You probably wouldn't get it.

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why was the gay person gay? he liked penis in his bum.

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple You thought I was going to steal an anti-joke didnt you squidward

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:Knock Knock :Don't be stupid there's no door here.

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What does the average fishermen catch Fish

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What happens when two Mexicans walk up to blonde and a red head sitting in car? The Mexicans attempt to smash the windshield with crowbars because they have issues with anger. The redhead turns on the car and reverses safely.

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what did the man with Alzheimer's say to his son? who are you!?

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away Because no dog likes being called "hurrrrdhjkdhjsaklhdkhjkddssaduyiwqkhdbewcjk"

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was trying to escape the evil villains in giant mech suits.

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Ever heard of carpel tunnel? Well after that girl it was more like carpal toungal

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I love you very much.

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Two muffins are sitting in an oven. One says, "It is quite hot in here." This is a lie. Neither of the muffins spoke because in reality, Muffins are not only inanimate objects, they are not humans, and therefore they do not have the ability to speak in a comprehensible language.

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Question: What do you call a Black person who cooks food at a fried chicken restaurant? Answer: A chef

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Whats worse than having a parking cone rammed up your ass? Realizing that a big orange cone is up your ass.

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I scream, You scream, The police come, It's awkward.

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Four blonds are driving to Disney World when they come across a sign that says Disney World left, so they proceed to make a left at the next stop and have a wonderful time in what many people consider the most wonderful place in the world.

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A man walks into a party, walks over to the snack stand, and is surprised to find that there is no punch line.

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What do you call three black guys in a bar? A bar.

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Why do Pelicans stand on one leg? Because if they stood on none, they'd fall over.

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you: Why did the chicken cross the road? them: "To get to the other side...?" you: Oh! *stare*

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What's eighteen inches long, stiff, and makes women scream at night? A twelve inch long penis that is erect, thus adding approximately one half of its flaccid size, and involved in the act of fornication with the female partner of the man whose penis I am describing. (Of course, it is ignorant and juvenile to assume that the man in question is heterosexual. He may be a homosexual, which is perfectly acceptable in these liberal times we live in, or he may in fact be single and not inclined towards a sexual preference of any kind. This is understandable due to the myriad complications of long-term relationships, a result of the infinite differences between the masculine and feminine psyches.)

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Why did the boy have pink skin at night? Because he did not put on a sufficient amount of sunscreen that morning. This is also known as sunburn.

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What did the teacher say to the other teacher? We are both teachers. -Del Primm

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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