What did Hellen Keller's parents punish her? They didn't. She was a blind deaf-mute, there was very little she could do wrong

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I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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knock knock whos there? knock knock whos there knock knock you final decide to open the door to find a deaf man needing directions.

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Whats worse then getting stabbed in the trachea by a aids infected knife? getting pounded anally by satan

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Why is a giraffe's neck so long? Because its head is so far away from its shoulders.

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gay rights

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Q: Whats the first thing you see when you wake up? A: I don't know.

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I viewed the terms of service and did not agree to them.

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Three left giraffe testicles fell out of the sky and into a woman's grocery bag. "Did you know that 16 people die from dolphin rape every year? said Adolf Hitler as he began eating a horse.

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What word starts with "F" and ends with "uck"? Fuck.

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A man walks into a bar. The bar is closed and the man is a thief. The police are promptly called in fear that the situation may become increasingly dangerous.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he had just been brutally raped by a lawnmower. The lawnmower had been hit by a car. The woman driving the car was suffering from Alzheimers disease. Which then escalated from the stress of the accident that she took her cat and ripped his right ass cheek then continued on with her day

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abcdefghijklmnopqrstuvwxyz

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Roses are red. Violets are red. Your garden's on fire.

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A twelve year old walks into a bar. How Tragic

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Why did the retirement home go out of business. There was a fire and all of the residents charred to death accept for a couple who escaped but were too traumatized to return to the old folks home.

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-Why did Sally fall off the swing? Why? -She had no arms. -Knock, knock. Who's there? -Not Sally.

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Why didn't suzie eat? Because she wasn't hungry

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What do you get when you cross a black guy and a keyboard? A black guy punctured by a keyboard

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In Pokemon, why are bug types super effective against dark types? Because Ebola affected a lot in Africa.

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whats long and green? weed

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Why did the booger throw a fit? Because it was getting picked on.

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Knock Knock Who's there? 20 20 Who? 24

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Why did the girl blush when she opened the fridge? Because she saw the salad dressing

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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