How many people does it take to eat an apple ? One, unless it is divided into pieces for everyone to enjoy.

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a brunet,a redhead,and a blone were stranded on an island 4 miles away from land. the brunet swam 1 mile and drowned. the redhead swam 2 and drowned. the blond swam 3 miles and decided to swim 3 miles back to the island

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I love you very much.

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What do you get six year old Hitler for his birthday? An Easy Bake Oven

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Why is Scientology the Fastest Growing Religion of 21st Century? It isn't, its a cult.

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Your feet are so big your gonna need bigger shoes.

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What do a magazine and a banana have in common? They both have pages, except for the banana.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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What did the black man say to the white man? "I like your shirt" The black man walked off and lived out the rest of his days in peace.

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What was Dillon's old name? Dillon, I lied about the old name part.

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The average man ejaculates at 40mph, which is why its safer to hit a child at 30mph

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How can you tell if a substance is an acid or a base just by looking at it? You can't. pH or Litmus paper would be necessary in order to determine whether a substance is an acid or a base.

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hold the planet Dumb ass well I'm doing something else right now dumb ass

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Why did Jack like oranges? - Penis

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Why was the white man arrested? He was a rapist.

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If there are four gay men that come into a bar and need to sit down when all you have is one stool; what do you do? Get three more stools.

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Whats worse than living with cancer? Dieing of cancer.

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Yo' mama's so poor that she can't afford many of the privileges of everyday life.

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What is the difference between a baby and a tree? Its not illegal to hit one with an axe

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How did the boy get a bruise? His mum threw a fridge at him! How did the boy get a big graise? He got mulched! Why did the boy get molested? Because he was naked in Mr. Molestogiacomo's house!

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What is the worst thing about a couple of white kids playing with a couple of black kids? There are no parks or recreation centers within walking distance from there houses.

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A black guy and an apple fall out of a tree, which one hits the ground first? They both hit the ground roughly at the same time, because the acceleration due to gravity is constant.

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what's black and can't swim? a black refrigerator

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How do you get a bear out of tree? You shoot it

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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