Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was blind, not to mention deaf and mute.

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Whats a joke with no meaning? This one

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Knock Knock Who's there? There's a peephole on your door why don't you go ahead and look

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A girl asked a guy if he thought she was pretty, He said 'No'. She asked him if he would want to be with her forever. He said 'no'. She then asked him if she were to leave would he cry, Once again, he replied 'no'. She had heard enough. As she walked away, tears streaming down her face the boy grabbed her arm and said.. 'Asking emotionally charged hypothetical questions that are completely irrelevant to the prior conversation can be known as fishing for compliments or reassurance of your value as a human being. Except, your tears seem to reflect a more serious inner emotional neediness. I suggest you seek a psychologist.'

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When you are swimming across the ocean, and you lose your wheels, what's the difference between a duck? ... Because bananas have no bones.

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What's that Lassie? Timmy fell in the well again? And you couldn't care less because the stupid kid never looks where he's going?

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What did the boy with no legs get for his birthday? A bike

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Crime doesn't pay. Sure it does

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A cheeseburger and fries walk into a bar. The bartender says "sorry, we don't serve lunch"

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The snake had no skatebord to put johnnys refrigirator because the bettles mom had stolen the clowns purse were his parking had been for the airplane higway stop.

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Why was 9 afraid of 1? Because when dialed together, an emergency call was most likely coming and 9 is very sensitive to those types of moments

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I'm gay. No homo.

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man walks into a bar his lack of awareness means that he didnt notice the maintenance sign in front of him he falls in a 200foot deep hole and dies.

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what did one lady say to another lady we are both ladies

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Why did the girl cross the road? To get run over by a bus.

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A man walks up to you and asks you:"What's funnier than a dead baby?" and then smiles, you then proceed to frown and tell him he needs to seek help. The next day you see his face on your TV

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A fire at a chinese high school caused the death of many children. The drill was unsucessful.

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guest who else is a ugly bitch my mom

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Why did the father smash his sons head into the dentist's building? Because he had a locker in his mouth. Also, equestrian.

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What's the difference between a Jewish child and pizza? Pizza does not scream in the oven.

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Why did the italian go to jail? because he had just robbed a bank and then brutally murdered his wife and kids.

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Two attractive women were getting ready to visit the gym. On the way there, they stopped at a local sports store to purchase some new shorts, and they got it at a good discount price

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Whats the difference between a quarter and a penny? 24 cents.

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What smells like satans pubic hair and dresses like a woman? Vinny Trolia

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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