Say this to someone: On a scale from one to ten, what is your favorite color?

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What is it too late to do? Apologize...

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why didnt jane scream when she got robbed? Because she got shot.

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I wonder if barrack Obama will rename the whitehouse...to the blue house because it is his favorite color

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How do you become a multi-trilionere? Get bored...

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what's a self-driving car 10 years from now? probably just "a car".

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Chuck Norris died.

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What is funnier than an uncontrolled explosions? Most things, because explosions damage property, and cause deaths.

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ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSUCKMYDICK

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Limericks are fun, I have an orange Nothing rhymes with orange crap orange

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Do you know what a lion really is? It's an over sized cat.

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What did the one legged girl do when her apartment caught on fire? She tried to hop to safety, but died of smoke inhalation.

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What is worse worse than stubbing your toe? The Holocaust.

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Knock knock. Who's there? You. You who? That's the joke.

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Why was the girl crying? She just got diagnosed with cancer you inconsiderate bastard.

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How do you fit 100 Jews in a car? You can't

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Tommy was excited to get a tattoo of a falafel on his wiener. He got skin cancer.

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I never knew I was dyslexic. Then one day I showed up to a toga party dressed as a goat.

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Why doesnt snow like Asians? Snow is a form of precipitation within the Earth's atmosphere in the form of crystalline water ice, consisting of a multitude of snowflakes that fall from clouds. Since snow is composed of small ice particles, it is a granular material. It has an open and therefore soft structure, unless packed by external pressure. Snowflakes come in a variety of sizes and shapes. Types which fall in the form of a ball due to melting and refreezing, rather than a flake, are known as graupel, ice pellets or snow grains. Therefore since snow is unhuman they are then thus incapable of emotions because they lack any vitals organs.

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There once was a man from Kentucky...then he raped everyone in sight... THE END

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Listen bitch, get over here, let me poke out your fucking eyeball, and then you tell me if it is reasonable or not to fucking be pissed afterwards! As for your goddamn technique, of course I understand it, I use it too, its the ironman method as far as I am concerned. Do not share it with people here, you can go share it with your little "shadow people" but that shit took years to develop. But yeah, you tell me whatever the hell you consider "reasonable" you get me the money, and then we can see about being "reasonable". I know many of your methods, NLP, hypnosis, covert, warm and cold reading, I know you are no fucking psychic nor do you read minds, stop telling me what the hell your "Order" is, because whatever the hell it is, your "Nero`s" have proven on this site alone, that its a laughingstock that in no way could have brought six hundred people towards liking you, even less six millions.

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Why did the man cross the road? His mother had recently passed away after a 12 year battle with lung cancer and is visiting her tombstone.

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What's pink and fluffy? Pink fluff.

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no jokes left :( ill try to make some more the ones with nude in my comments is mine

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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