so a horse walks into a bar right, and he goes up to the bartender, and the bartender being a smartass says why the long face(get because hes a horse), and the horse says his wife is dying of lung cancer, child services are taking his kids away , and im addicted to crack and that is why i have a long face the bartender then gives him the next round for free and the the horse dies of alchohol poisoning

A squirrel asks an apple where is the nearest gas station. The apple doesn't reply.

what do you do when you see the klu klucks klan ? act white

Why did the black guy lose the race? He toke an arrow to the knee

What do you call an 8 year-old with no friends? A Sandy Hook survivor

What did the fish say after he swam into a wall? Dam

Why did the jelly baby go to school? Because he was brought up in a middle class background and wanted a full education to further his future career

is the glass of milk half empty or half full it is scientifically proven that these are the same thing. Choosing one over the other is like saying that 1/2 does not equal 1-1/2. A normal person would just see this as an ordinary glass of milk.

Micheal Jackson walks into a bar?

Why didn't the chicken cross the road... Because he got hurt last week while crossing the road.

Whats white? A fridge

How many jews can you get in a car? 5, if you don't want any cops after you. The answer can also be 2,6,7,8,9. It's from car to car.

Your mother is so fat, that she was instructed by her doctor to go on a low carbohydrate, high protein diet to reduce the risk of heart disease later in life.

What do a squirrel and a cucumber have in common? They both cant ride bikes

How many electricians does it take to change a light bulb? 1

Knock Knock. Whos there? I am the danger! Danger who? I AM THE ONE WHO KNOCKS!

What did the strawberry say to the strawberry? Nothing because strawberries are fruit and can't talk

82

A boy eats 3 pounds of candy, 2 whole pizzas, and drinks 10 beers. Why did he puke? Someone came out of nowhere, and kicked him in the nuts

Knock Knock Who's There Me

toast points

Wanna hear a Harry Potter joke? Knock Knock Who's there? You know You know who?

Why is the sky blue? Because bicycles have two tires

Do you also think Daffy Duck is really attractive when he dresses up like a woman? Yeah, me neither...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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