roses are black, violets are black, im dead.

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What was the motto of the Holocaust? Yolo.

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Ask me if I'm a tree. Are you a tree? No.

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Why did the girl drop her ice cream her cone broke

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What's faker than a rich mexican? A unicorn smoking weed

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Why'd the clown fall out of the tree? it died. Why'd the cat fall out of the tree? it died Why'd the chicken fall out of the tree? it was stapled to the clown

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what do you call a top thats spining? A spinning top

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Since chickens cannot speak, it is difficult to say.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a bagel.

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Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she had cancer and died.

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There are only three kinds of math teachers: teachers that can count and teachers that can't count

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One day, a mother was talking with her three daughters. "Mommy," the first one asked, "Why did you name me Daisy?" "Because when we took you home, a daisy fell on your head." "Mommy," the second one said, "Why did you name me Rose?" "Because when we took you home, a rose fell on your head." ..."MMMBBWWAAAAAGGGHH!" the third daughter cried. She was born with severe cognitive damage and is incapable of coherent speech.

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Yo mama so dumb she brought a spoon to the Super Bowl! I'm sorry,that was just really rude of me. I've been talking to my therapist and I think this insolent behavior came from my dad. I always wanted his approval but he always liked my brother more and blah blah yak yak.....

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You're momma's so fat, Oh wait. She's not.

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A Jew, black person, and Mexican jump out of a plane, which one falls first? Who cares they all died

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One time i ate a hamberger than an hour later i sneezed but i dont think it had anything to do with the hamberger.

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Why was the crazy person allowed to leave the asylum? The ombusman's report will be on your desk this morning minister.

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A zebra was on his way to a water hole. On the way he met 6 giraffes. Each giraffes had 3 monkeys around their neck. Each monkey had 2 birds on their head. How many animals went to the water hole? A:One, the zebra.

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Dave: Hey, Doug! How was your day? Doug: My mother is dead.

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A man goes to the doctor suspecting he might have erectile dysfunction. The doctor raises an eyebrow and asks, "Does it come up a lot?" "No."

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Q: Why was the man hit by the train? A: He was tied to the rail road tracks...

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Knock Knock Come in Thank you very much. Don't mention it. Would you like a home made spinach roll?

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A black man walks into a bar. He paid his tab and couldn't have been more polite.

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Ok class, we are doing arts and crafts today, but remember, have fun and be creative... Thats what she said

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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