i need a pooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo

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My dog has no nose! Then how does he smell? Terrible!

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What Do You Call a Black Man With a Gun?? A Cop

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Max who Max Who's there Knock knock I'm dyslexic

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A priest, a rabbi, and a monk are standing near a cliff. They say that they are of the best religion. The priest jumps off the cliff and says "God save me", he dies. The rabbi says "Allah save me", he dies. The monk says "Buddha save me" he is saved, in relief he says "Oh thank God" he dies

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What's the difference between a horse and a unicorn? Horses are real.

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- knock knock. - Who's There? - Steve. - Steve who? - Fitzsimmons. We met at your wife's work party.

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Recent US presidents (and their accompanying economy)

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What's the difference between Neil Armstrong and Michael Jackson? Neil Armstrong walked on the moon and Michael Jackson appeared in court several times under charges of child molestation

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Why 't the blonde dial 911? Because phones haven't had dials on them for at least 40 years or so. She can however punch it in on her keypad.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? He was in the designated crosswalk area and there was no oncoming traffic.

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Why did Alex fall off the swing? he had no arms

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old people are like slinkies...they arent really good for anything but brings a smile to ur face when they're pushed down the stairs...just think about it ;)

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Knock knock Who's there? Derek the crazy man in the village and I have come to shoot you.

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How do you make a baby crawl in circles? Nail its hand to the ground

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Knock Knock! Who's there? Hitler.

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Your mother is so fat that she will likely eventually develop diabetes.

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Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf of bread.

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What do you call a Muslim guy on a plane? A passenger.

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If you're happy and you know it - put your hands in the air i have a gun.

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How is it called a black man piloting a plane? Pilot, you racist!

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R2-D2 is quite possibly the most vulgar character on the set of Star Wars. Every word he says is bleeped out.

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I accidentally solicited a prostitute today. I was driving in an iffy neighborhood and saw a woman on the sidewalk, so I stopped to ask if she could give me directions. She must have misheard me.

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Why didn't the kid get a bike for Christmas? Because his parents died and Santa's not real

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops