(waving left hand) Why doesn't Queen Elizabeth wave with this hand? Why? Because this is my hand.

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What number comes after 29? 30.

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69

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When there's something strange in your neighborhood, who ya gonna call? The Police. There's something strange in your neighborhood.

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Knock Knock No one's home Okay, I'll come back later.

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roses are red violets are blue tis poem makes no sense so screw you

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because SEVEN-FIVE!!!

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roses are red violets are blue i done your mom and i do you too

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Q: Whats worse than 8 babies in one bin? A: 1 babies in 8 bins

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A boy walks into his friend's house for a party. While he waits for his friends to return from the bar he realizes there are many people waiting in different lines for various kinds of drinks. After his friends return he decides he does not want any of the carbonated drinks they had ordered, instead he chooses to wait in the fruit punch line. There is no punch line.

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A:Will you be my valentine? B:No

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Where did the Welsh man work? At an office complex.

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ecks! why zee?

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How do you kill one Jew. A gun. How do you kill a thousand Jews. With a millon angery germans.

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What is the same about fries chicken and watermelon? There both delicious.

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What did the cannibal eat for Christmas. Your Mom!

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THere was three bees eating Honeynut cherrios one of them had a speech impediment.

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Q:Why couldn't the baby walk down the hall way? A: It had a javelin stuck in its head.

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what did your mum say when she ran into chuck norris? hello chuck norris

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Why was 1 afraid of 2? Because 234!

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Why did the Flyers lose to the Blackhawks in the Stanley Cup? Because they aren't as good as the Blackhawks.

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whats worse then the worst thing that happened in your life? nothing.

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how do u get a nun pregnant? dress her up as an alter boy

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Why do women get pregnant? Beacuse it hurts and they deserve it.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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