What's harder than a rock? The dead baby in my freezer.

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Why did the first monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was DEAD! But why did the second monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was stapled to the first monkey... But then why did the third monkey fall out of the tree? P-p-p-p-eer pressure

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What did God say to Noah? "Hi."

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How do you make a little girl cry? Throw a brick at her face.

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So last night I was f**king my girlfriend and I flip her over and f**k her up the ass. Later we're sitting having a cigarette when she says, "you know it was pretty presumptuous of you to think you can just flip me over and f**k me up the ass." And I said, "presumptuous!? That's a pretty big word for a 5th grader."

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What's worse than kicking your dog? Eating it.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Hello. We would like to talk about Jesus with you.

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Why did the cancerous elephant cross the road?

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What do you call an African baby?............................................ A Nigglet.

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Q: What did the Mexican kid get for Christmas? A: My bike.

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Its a bird! No, it's a plane! Oh... so it is.

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A man walks into a bar. We see him as he approaches the register wearing a dark hoody. The surveillance camera seen here catches a glimpse of the man's face appearing to be a white male with mustache and beard. As you can see the man opens the register and takes the money before the bartender can get to him. If you have any information about this crime please call crime stoppers at 1-800-GET-HELP. In other news, the DOW JONES reached a record high today as investors in China begin working on keeping the economy from plundering.

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Q: why did a sanke have a rattle A: it was born wiith it

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Mikey : I wan to divorce. Miney :are u funking crazy Mikey : no I'm funking dazy !

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why did the black boy start crying when he was taking a dump? He thought he was melting

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How long does it take for a dead baby to explode in the microwave? I don't know; I was too busy masturbating.

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Why did the black man fall asleep? because he was tired.

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What's a black man's favorite food? It depends.

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What do you call a girl with one leg at your door step? Ilean

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yo mamas so ugly she makes blind children cry

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I heard the new Batman movie was to die for

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Three postmodernists walk into a bar. The barman says "What's this, some kind of anti joke?"

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Brother Bro-ther Broad her Soap

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A man walked into the woods with alzheimers......pancakes

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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