I went to the doctor & he gave only 6 months to live. I told him I couldn't pay my bill, he said "that doesn't change the fact you're going to die soon."

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Why was the Librarian mad at the laughing kids?? they were laughing cause someone shot her.

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Yo mama's has so much acne, I decided to give her proactive.

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A girl said to her boyfriend, "you take my breath away." The boy said, "that isn't possible" and they proceeded to have sex.

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hear hear

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Woody Allen once said, "I have had many romantic relationships in my life that were both complex and humorous."

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Whats worse than the Holocaust? Stubbing your toe

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Q: Why did sally fall off the swing? A: Because she had no arms Knock Knock Who's there Not Sally! How did Sally die? She couldn't figure out how to open the fridge

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A guy walks into a bar. He was an alcoholic and it was destroying his family.

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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What is 1+1? It's 2!

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What did the robot say to the centipede? Stop being a centipede. -It's funny because the robot doesn't have any arms.

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Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven three twelve. Am i doing it right?

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Chris Bosh's neck

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There is a black man and a Mexican standing near the edge of a cliff, the black man turns to the Mexican and says, "We probably shouldn't stand this close to the edge of a cliff" The Mexican agrees and they step away from the cliff.

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Why did the jew go into the gas chamber? Because he thought he was going to get a shower.

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7 chickens ran down the road. One ate a spider. He is now the fattest chicken.

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A boy walks into a bar, then walked out. He's not 21!

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Why are butt pirates butt pirates? Because they just ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR FRUITS

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How are Steve Jobs and The iPhone the same? They got progressively thinner over time.

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Curiosity killed the cat! No, the tire of a vehicle did.

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What do u call an anorexic with a yeast infection? -a quarter pounder with cheese. (not really anti-joke, im a girl and thought this was funny lol)

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What did the terrorist get for Christmas? A bullet in his head.

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What time did the Chinese man go the dentist? About 5 minutes prior to his appointment

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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