What did the boy reading a book do?  Well, studies show that reading connects the synapses in the human brain, thus, making said boy reading the book a tad bit smarter.

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Billy: Why do pirates say rrrrr? Mark: I don't know, I'm not a pirate.

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what happens when you put Rihanna and Chris brown in the same room? Rihanna dies

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A man walked into a bar. Ouch.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Your doorbell is broken.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Cause your mom has cancer

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What do we call the science of classifying living things? Racism

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*Knock Knock* Who's there? Hello, I'm here to deliver your groceries. Ok thank you, please leave them by the front door.

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What did 6 say to 7? Nothing, numbers are abstract concepts thought up by humans and therefore, they cannot speak or converse in any sort of language.

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Why didn't the elephant do any tricks? It was dead.

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Hush, little baby, don't say a word, Mama's going to buy you a mockingbird. If that mockingbird won't sing, Mama's going to buy you a another mockingbird.

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Why was the little boy's head so big? He had a tumor in his brain.

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How did the black guy survive from drowning? Years of Swimming lessons at his local YMCA

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I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic And so am I

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A woman walking alone through a poor area of town. She is approached by a man who proceeds to mug her, rape her, and murder her.

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A man brings his entire family in to meet a show producer. The producer says, "Okay, let's see what you got." The man then proceeds to lead his family through a variety of acts, including showcasing the proper way to drink English tea and how to dress for a polo match. When they finish, the producer asks, "And just what do you call your act?" To which the man replies, "The Aristocrats!"

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Susie is 14 & she never listens to her mom, why is that? She's deaf.

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A man from florida and a woman from florida go to a restaurant, which isnt very popular.

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Hey, you why you say poo poo nae nae watch me whip, and do the dougie, and then happy halloween? Potato Salad

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What do you call a guy selling drugs? A pharmacist

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Whats funnier then two babies falling off a cliff? 2 babies falling off a cliff

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Why did Michael Jackson die Cuz

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Who made it down the cliff first the blonde or brunet? The brunet, the blonde had to stop for directions

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops