A grasshopper walks into a bar and no one notices because it's just a little insect.

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Why was the mexican being lazy? Because he lead a very successful life and retired early and now can enjoy the luxury of the finer things in life.

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I once had my heart broken by my first true love. I then died, she was convicted of murder and my family grieved over my death.

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Q:What did the deaf kid say to the blind kid? A: nothing deaf kids can't talk they can only have conversations with their hands,which would be pretty useless at this moment cause the blind kid can't see his hand guestures

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An slutty attractive secretary went into her boss' office He killed her.

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How do you get a clown off of a swing? You throw an axe at its face.

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How does a black guy in debt make money fast at the bank? He applies for a loan and conscientiously works hard to pay off the loan in turn, which he was lucky enough to get at a low interest rate.

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pretend its saturday.... what is the square root of 9? who cares? everyone knows that you don't do math on saturday.

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The chicken didn't cross the road. Therefor, there is no why.

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roses are red, violets are blue, no one cares, your adopted.

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what do German people eat at BBQ ' s ? burgers and hotdogs and kebabs and fried chicken with a garnish of summer salad washed down with a cold mouth tingling glass of coca cola and jews

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Your momma's so obnoxious, your dad left.

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whats brown and sticky? A stick

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What's scarier than a ghost? Ur mum.

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Why did the blonde go to McDonald's ? Because she was hungry.

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1 what do gay horses eat? 2 hayyyy 1 no horse dick

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Why did Tyrone attack? Because he was getting made fun of

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What do you call a whale driving a plane? A horibble massacre.

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Hi i want a cheeseburger and a small fry, said bob. And then, said the guy taking the order. thats all, said bob. And then, said the guy. Ummmm ok well i take small coke, said bob. And then, said that guy. Thats all, said bob. and then, said the guy. whatever i'll take a milkshake, said bob. And then, said that guy. and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then and then

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Why couldn't the man read? Because he was illiterate

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Why is our country going downhill? Because going uphill is harder.

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A frog walked into a bar. Except by frog I meant Frenchman, and by bar I meant English pub. The Englishmen in the bar kill the Frenchman in a display of territoriality.

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why did the homeless man die? because everyone does.

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What do Austrailian cows say? Moo.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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