Why did the chicken cross the road? It was in a cage being carried by a farmer.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

Hi

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did the blonde stare at the orange juice? She was making sure there was enough sugar in it in case her diabetic son was to have an attack.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What do you say to two cows? Hey cows.

thumb_up thumb_down +30

man ur hairline is soooo far back the archaeologists couldn't find it

thumb_up thumb_down -15

Mary had a little lamb, But it couldn't stop her from being raped.

thumb_up thumb_down +8

You heard about that piece of shit that says no all the time? Yes, I bet you haven't though. no.

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Gabe Mercado

thumb_up thumb_down -8

What has two legs, takes away your money, and causes depression? A Democrat.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

Why did the gir fall off of the swing? She had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +16

If Hellen Keller could meet Obama, what would she say? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

how do u kill a blonde: drop something shiny at the bottom of a pool how do u kill 2 blondes: but a mirror at the bottom of a pool how do u kill 3 blondes: ask which 1 of them is the prettiest and then wait 5 minuetes:)

thumb_up thumb_down -14

A guy with cancer walks into a bar... No one treated him any special way, it's not like he had I have cancer written on his forehead.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

What's brown and sticky? ...poop....and refried beans

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Are you gay. No. Ok.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What do you call a fish that is missing an eye. fsh.

thumb_up thumb_down +37

Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because I hit her with a shovel.

thumb_up thumb_down +18

Why did the chicken cross the road? Jupiter is the Galaxys biggest planet!

thumb_up thumb_down -11

If I were a cat, would you help with the toast?

thumb_up thumb_down +16

If life hands you melons you might be dyslexic

thumb_up thumb_down +9

The next person to submit a 'roses are red' 'joke', is cursed to always prematurely ejaculate from here until eternity

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Have you heard the one about the fat woman and the dead baby? The woman was actually pregnant, not fat, and just had a miscarriage.

thumb_up thumb_down +13

A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear. The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf." (props- Marty Smith)

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Hi, how are you doing? Good, yourself? Fine, thanks. Have a nice day. You too, bye.

thumb_up thumb_down +20

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops