Q: What's brown and sticky? A: A stick.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a worm in every apple.

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A man walks in front of a bus. The bus driver avoids the man but hits the boy eating ice cream.

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What did the orange say to the apple? Nothing, fruits can't talk.

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What did everyone call the ginger kid? Jimmy as that was his name...

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whats funnier than a joke? A: a funnier joke

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whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? getting your Fallopian tubes ripped out by wolverine

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Q:Why did the man fall down the stair I don't know? A:Because he wasn't careful

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange Who? Oranges are very good for you and enriched with vitamin C that is apparently good to intake when you are experiencing cold/flu like symptoms during the winter season and your doctor won't give you medication because you aren't sick enough and you already ask for medication to much because you think you are always sick with something. That's what happens when you're a hypochondriac.

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I saw a woman get donkey punched in the middle of the street. Nero the clit collector: You know... What is it called when A donkey kinda lifts its front hoove and hits a woman? ...WHAT? DO YOU KNOW HOW MANY PEOPLE STARVE TO DEATH BECAUSE OF YOUR COIN COLLECTION? YOUR STAMPS ARE MURDER! (or something) At least my uh... "Friends" survive... SOMETIIIIIIIIMEEEEEEEEES!!!!!!! ...And then I kill them.

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Why did the wife leave her husband? Because they were having sexual differences and time restraints. The husband worked nightshifts as a nurse while the woman stayed home and took care of their child. The husband confessed he never wanted a child in the first place, and that having sexual intercourse with her didn't truly satisfy him.

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A man and his horse walk into a bar, he is told to leave because animals are not allowed on the property

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why did the chicken cross the road? who cares?

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Why did the elephant fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the second elephant fall out of the tree? Because it was attached to the first elephant. Why did the third elephant fall out of the tree? Peer pressure.

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Rose's are red, Violet's are blue, I have a gun... Get in the van!

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What's the difference between a Chinese guy and a bucket of fried chicken? There are numerous differences.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have Ebola How about you?

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Knock Knock. Go Away!

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What's bigger than a moose? An even bigger moose.

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Why did the girl drop her lolly pop? She was hit by a bus.

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penus

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What has sand and an ocean? A picture of a beach.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Me. Oh.

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What's rock hard and is sharp? A rock...and my penis.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops