what did the cat say to the dog? I turded out my crap hole

Why did the jew go into the gas chamber? Because he thought he was going to get a shower.

A Jew, a Christian and a Muslim walk into a bar. I don't know what happens next, I got the fuck out of there before shit went down

I've had amnesia as long as I can remember

(In a job interview) Interviewer: Name a time when you've failed sometime Me: I failed an HIV test last June, anything else?

What do you call a Muslim in control of a plane? A pilot

Why was the 45 year old man crying? He shit his pants.

What happened to the baby in the microwave? I don't really remember, I was too busy jacking off.

Q: Why did sally fall off the swing? A: She got hit in the face with an axe

Whats green and has wheels? A green honda

two guys walk into a bar, the third one ducks.

Why did Patrick cross the road Because he saw a rock

What's orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot

Knock knock Who's there? What are you, blind?

knock, knock . whos there? the police. get the hell outside !

Whats the difference between a jew and a pizza? I can cook a pizza.

What does the alien say to the man? Nothing, because it is highly unlikely that an alien would ever land on Earth, and even more unlikely that they would speak the same language of us. On top of that, aliens would not know anything about our species, and would probably hide from us due to being frightened and eventually flee back to their home planet where we would never see them again because our techonology is not advanced enough and the chances that we would find their planet which is somewhere among the billions of planets in the universe, are slim.

A man walks into a bar. There were no survivors.

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust

Why did the black man go to the store with a gun? He recently bought it a couple days before to go hunting, but it wasn't working correctly.

Why did your ears get blasted with sound? You never turned the volume down..

What do you call two gay black men in one sleeping bag? There names

whats the difference between ur mom and my mom? nothing i slept with both of them

How do you stop a clown from laughing? Hit him in the face with an ax.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...