What happens if an unmovable object gets hit by an unstoppable force? To get to the other side.

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Roses are red, foxes are clever, I like your butt, let me touch it forever!

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Because I hit her with a shovel.

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Man who wrote "The Hokey Pokey" died. Hard part was getting him into the coffin. They put his left leg in and then the trouble started..

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Roses are black Violets are black A black person died

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women's rights

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tea with milk?

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Yo mama so old, she used to babysit Dumbledore

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what do call a dead dog in between two planks of wood? big sandwhich.

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Guy 1: Where's your dog Guy 2: I Dunno Guy 1: I ate it

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A homeless man gets a computer. Later that day he is found dead inside the computer.

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read down and see what it is like BEFOR MARRIAGE boy:at last.i can hardly wait! girl:do you want to leave me? boy:NO! dont even think about it! girl:do you love me? boy:ofcourse! always girl:have you ever cheated on me? boy:NO! why are you even asking? girl:will you kiss me ? boy:every chance i get! girl:will you hit me ? boy:hell no! are you crazy ? girl:can i trust you? boy:yes! girl:darling!! read up again and see what it is like AFTER MARRIAGE (L.W)

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

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Why were the teacher's eyes crossed? She got kicked in the face by a mule.

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Why did the chicken change the projector reel? To get to the other slide.

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Joke

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teacher:humpty dumpty sat on a wall.... me: wait, why was he up there ms.park? teacher: well hes never been the same since vietnam, his wife divorced him and now hes a raging alcoholic.

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Why couldn't the blonde write the number eleven? She was paralyzed.

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What do you call a disease caused by an uncontrolled division of abnormal cells in a part of the body? Cancer.

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what do you call a black guy with a bachelor's degree? by his first name, "Carl".

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Why didn't the skeleton go to the party? Because he wasn't invited.

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Whats on my leg? A pimple. What is it doing? Releasing a white/clear puss.

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Where do babies come from? You fathers penis.

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How long does it take for a dead baby to explode in the microwave? I don't know, I was too busy masterbating.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops