A girl falls out of a tree. She got hit by a flying pig.

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A vegetarian walked into a butcher Luckily he realized where he was and walked out!

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whats slower then a turtle A FATTY

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A blonde walks into a bar She said, agh that hurt

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What do you get when you cross an Indian and a duck? An Indian duck.

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You know how I felt about Nero, no way id ever date anyone but you, back then that is. Fine I will come along, I bet you left the base at "point zero" without the information he left, you have not changed a bit Seth, always too impulsive for your own good, but Nero was always like that and that, turned out, well damn. Tell me first, if you come get me, how much have you really changed mentally from the last time we met? You sincerely sound like a psychopath and I could use a shoulder to cry on rather than be escorted to some sick torture dungeon thing. I gather you are not far away, could you please get over here asap? I do not care about more than the standard code anymore, you have not changed much, except you are a deranged psychopath now, I get it, in your place I think id do the same, I have no idea how bad Nero was doing when you found him, and I sure as hell dont want to know.

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How do you rescue a fat girl that's stuck under a car? With a pickaxe and a donkey.

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Justin Bieber.

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What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter it's not going to come to you anyway.

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Why was the boy mentally retarded? Because his mother was a tree

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What's worse then ten dead babies being nailed to a tree? Being the one to take them down.

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Your mama's so fat, she cries daily and regularly questions her purpose in life.

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What do u call a mixture of black people and asian people. Breakfast- Scrambled Eggs and Sausage

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your mama's so fat she wears big clothing

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Uber Driver: "Hey I'm close, where are you?" Me: "oh, I see you!" Uber Driver: "Are you that guy in the middle of the road?" Me: "yeah, floor it"

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What is the difference between a black man and a bench A bench can support a family of five

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What person looks most like Jim Carry? Jim Carry

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what do you call a black pilot? A) a pilot

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they call me the green lantern because my little sister died in chemical fire

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What did the Lumberjack say before cutting down the tree? Nothing, it's his job.

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What's black and at the top of a burning building? A paraplegic

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What happened to Johnny when he tripped over his shoelace? He was shot by the man who was following him.

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What's big? Jupiter.

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What does a black guy get for Christmas? Everything you own

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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