how did the kid cut open his forehead? by putting on his underwear!

The hippo's an African beast, Who notably is quite obese, Quite boorish and mean And never too lean And poops in the rivers, at least...

how many toyota's does it take to pee on a soccer game 900 because isis is a cat vagina

Two bees are flying around a flower. "Hey," says one bee, "you ever think about the meaning of all of this? I mean, isn't there more to life than pollinating and satisfying the Queen?" The other bee replies, "No."

What happed to the kid who survived cancer? He got hit by a plain.

A minor walks into a bar. He's not very good at limbo.

What did the finger say to the thumb? I'm in glove with you.

xavier stop

Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations]) That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

7

An orphan walks into a bar. The bartender calls Child Protective Services and is given to a nice foster family.

Who got sarah pregnant? No one knows. She was a whore.

what do you get when you combine a vampire,werewolf,and whiny girlfriend ....... the worst show in the history of the earth

What did the Jew get for Christmas? Nothing. Jewish people celebrate Hanukkah

A man who was clearly tired and worn out enters a bar. The bartender says "Long night, eh?" The man responds "Yes, very. I was with my girlfriend." The bartender says in response "Well I'm sure that was a fun time, if you know what I'm sayin." "No, not really" says the man. Little did the bartender know, the man's girlfriend was a dominatrix.

What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Being the worm.

Q: Knock, Knock A: To get to the other side.

Q: What did the farmer say when he couldn't find his tractor? A: Where's my tractor?

how many cookies did the fat kid eat? a perfectly reasonable amount of cookies.

What clicks when its out of lead ? A gun Why was the little black boy crying ? He ran out of that grape drank How do you make a dead baby float ? You take your foot of its head How do you know when your life is over ? When you start watching Twilight What is blue and sticky ? Blue Stick What do you get when you mix a dog and a cat ? Shit

What do you call a over weight woman? Fat bitch.

fack me in the ace! CC

A man felt a pain in his stomach. He went to the doctor.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I doubt it thought much about this. The chicken is a simple animal, and i doubt its actions were spurred by any particular motivation.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

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The Anti Joke Book


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