A brown haired woman walks into a clinic and says, "Doctor it hurts whenever I touch myself." The doctor says, "Strange, I have never heard of such a disease. Please show me." The woman touches her leg and screams,"Ow!" Then she touches her arm and screams again. The doctor asks, "Are you a natural brunette?" The woman replies, "No, I am a blonde." The doctor says, "Oh, that explains it. You have a broken finger. God, you are so blonde." The woman gets her finger treated and then lives in agony for the rest of her life due to her untreated broken leg and arm.

Sam slept and never woke up again.. Because he followed his dream.

A very ugly man with has sex with a lamb because he is so ugly. He subsequently gets ghonorhea and dies 2 years later of brain cancer.

What do you call cheese that's not yours? STOLEN! You're under arrest.

You can pick your friends, you can pick your nose... But that's disgusting.

why was 6 afraid of 7 because 6 just found out 7 had genital herpes.

A gay guy walks into a bar. Nothing is said to him, because homosexuality is accepted in this area.

knock, knock who's their? police get down on the ground!

Why did the golfer wear two pair of trousers? Because he's a wanker

What do you call a man which busts ghosts A ghostbuster. Duh

Why could the woman not play the game monopoly? Because she did not own the game monopoly

Knock knock. Who's there? Orange. Orange who? Cancer.

why did the chicken cross the road? I dunno.

Roses are red. Violets are blue. Obviously.

Why couldn't the boy sing? The boy could sing, but the thick layer of duct tape prevented him from doing so.

Why did Jake not get on the bus? Answer: Because Jake is a dog. Dogs are not allowed on the bus.

what do you wear at a funeral? white. lol jk black

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Neither has he.

Do you know what's funny about the holocaust? Nothing, it was an unspeakably evil act by a deranged man who should never have been given the power to command a nation

What did Steven Hawkings say as he fell down the stairs? .................

Q: Whats red and bad for your teeth? A: a brick

1: Knock knock. 2: Who's there? 1: Boo. 2: Please do come on in Boo, its so lovely to see you!

Why did the prestigious college accept the Native American student? Trick question, Native Americans don't exist anymore.

I used to make references to characters in Skyrim, but then my uncle touched me...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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