Ask me if I am a tree. "Are you a tree?" No.

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Help, this is an urgent message from the S.S. Obesity. We're sinking; I can't imagine why.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Across the street was a strip mall containing a dry cleaners where he had to pick up his suit for his cousins wedding. The wedding caused controversy in the family considering she was jewish. He had a lot to drink and took a cab home, knowing the dangers of drunk driving in todays society. He had a great time.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She never got her drivers license.

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> Why wasn't the chicken able to cross the road? > Because he had severe autism and was Ambulophobic.

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What did the Atheist say in church? His best friend's eulogy.

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Why are elephants ears sooo big? The big ears are to help the elephants stay cool. Elephants don't sweat, so they have a hard time dissipating excess heat (keeping cool). Their large ears contain many blood vessels that allow heat to escape into the air. When you see elephants they are usually moving their ears back and forth. This fanning helps to dissipate more heat than if their ears remained still. The enormous ears of elephants act as cooling devices. The gigantic earflaps (which can measure up to 2 square metres (21.5 square feet) are equipped with an intricate web of blood vessels. When the animal flaps its ears, the blood temperature lowers by as much as 5 degrees Celsius (9 degrees Fahrenheit). To keep cool

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Why can't you fly? Cause Ruddell says so.

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" I can't here you it's too dark!"

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? Blind.

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What's white and can't climb a tree? A fridge

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10 years ago, i man got cancer. He recovered and now leads a normal life.

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Why did Hellen Keller masturbate with her left hand? Because her right hand was tired.

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Knock, knock. Come in.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Mets.

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Roses are read Vilots are blue, I have a gun, Now get out of my house!!!

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What is black, white, and red all over? A skunk in a blender.

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You know what makes me smile? Face muscles.

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why can't Helen Keller drive? because she's a women

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Are you from Africa because YOU GOT AIDS

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Your momma's so stupid she stuck a power cable up her ass. Shortly after she died

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You

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What's green and fuzzy and if it fell out of a tree it could kill you? A pool table

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What is the difference between a jew and a pizza? One if part of the four main food groups, and one is not.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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