Why did the little girl keep running into things Because she was blind

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I like my women like i like my coffee... with big titis

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Q: Why did the plane crash? A: The pilot was a potato.

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A dyslexic man walked into a bra.

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How many shots do you have to take to start feeling light-headed? Ask JFK.

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Have you seen stevie wonders new piano? No Well it's really nice

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Oh na na not today Oh na na maybe tommrow

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A rabbi and priest both go into a bar... and they each had a responsible number of drinks before walking home.

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What's the difference between a Jew and a pizza? It's illegal to eat the Jew.

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Why some people don't get the flu twice? Because they died!

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A man walks into a bar. He leaves a large rucksack by the pool table and walks out. The rucksack then explodes and kills 13 people because it is the height of the Troubles and the man is a member of the IRA, who targetted the bar because it is regularly visited by British servicemen. The media extensively cover the story, and the two sides of the conflict in Northern Ireland decide that the bloodshed must stop, which eventually made way to the Good Friday agreement of 1998.

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Knock Knock Come in Thank you very much. Don't mention it. Would you like a home made spinach roll?

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What did the judge say to the criminal? I sentence you to a life time of solitary confinement.

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What's worse than doing the dishes with long sleeves? Finding out your girlfriend's been cheating on you.

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What do you call a man who leaves his wife and kids to be with another woman? A dick.

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Why did one sausage become scared of the other sausage? The first Sausage said " Hello " and the second Sausage said " OMG a talking sausage!!!" ...Jk sausages dont talk.

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What did T Pain say to the skipper of his yacht? I'm on a yacht

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Evicted.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

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What did the chair say when someone sat on it? Nothing. The person's butt covered the chair's mouth.

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That awkward moment when you have to tell your child you wanted an abortion, and still wish you had.

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Why do women like NASCAR? They don't.

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What did the 12 year old boy get for Christmas? Herpes

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Knock knock Who's there? Interrupting Cow. Interrupting Cow who? ..He died.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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