A man gets home from work with red on his collar. His wife asks what it is. The man replies "I had sex with a young woman, your to old and you disqust me"

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Why did the cat cross the road? He thought he would make it to the other side, but instead was hit by a mini van and soon after died in the bushes from internal bleeding.

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Two blondes walk into a bar. There is a fat man there, but nobody talks to him

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What's 1 + 1? Fish. What's 2+2? Window. pie.

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What did the homeless man find on the side of the street? A pile of dead babies.

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because it is very unsafe for blind individuals to operate motor vehicles.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I workout, Don't mess with me.

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Why was the man happy to see his wife dead? He beat her

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Why did moral man run out of morals? Moral: LEAVE MORAL MAN ALONE! BUAHAHAHA LEAVE HIM ALONE! BUAAAAAAAAHAHAHA!

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What's blue and orange at the bottom of a swimming pool? A dead baby, why's it there? I popped the arm bands.

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how do you stop a train? you cant..

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What's the best thing about sex with 24 year olds? They're in their sexual prime.

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What does Chuck Norris do when he breaks his legs? he calls a doctor.

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What falls down but never gets hurt? A professional stuntman wearing protective gear.

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Why Was a guy wearing Pink pants? Because He Was Gay.

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What's the difference between 10 dead babies and a Ferrari ? I don't have 10 dead babies in my garage.

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What is a gremlin's favorite snack? Gremlins aren't real.

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So this guy and his monkey walk into a bar, I forget the rest of the joke but your mothers a whore.

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a horse walks into a bar, the bartender says "why the long face?", the horse incapable of understanding the English language promptly shits on the floor and eats a bar stool.

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What did the caninibol do when he duped his girlfriend He wiped

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Q: what do you call a bunch of dead accountants? A: the holacost.

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why did the baby die? It was hit by a bus and then raped by a seal.

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penispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenis

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Why did Dolley Madison take the painting of George Washington out of the White House in 1814. It was on fire. By, Luke Atkins

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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