what goes plop, plop, fizz, fizz? baby twins in an acid bath.

thumb_up thumb_down +46

Why did Jay-Z rob a bank? Wait, nevermind. Jay-Z didn't rob a bank.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Two arabs fly into a bar.

thumb_up thumb_down -77

Why did Chuck Norris go to Chuck E Cheeses? Because his friend wanted to go.

thumb_up thumb_down +9

A black man walks in to a 7 Eleven with a gun in his left pocket. He innocently walks over to the place where they keep all the hostess treats, and decides to purchase a pack of crumb donuts. The gun was purely for self defense, it was a bad neighborhood.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

what's a fish with no eyes and out of water? its just a fish

thumb_up thumb_down -17

Where was Sally when the bomb exploded? Everywhere.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

12

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Why did the police officer pull over a black guy? He was going over the appropriate speed limit for that area.

thumb_up thumb_down -10

Whats the difference between a raisin and a old lady? One is alive, i think.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

whats the difrence between santa clause and a jew santa goes down the chimney

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was stapled to the dog, which also fell out of the tree.

thumb_up thumb_down -176

What's in a glass and drinky? A drink

thumb_up thumb_down -18

What do you call it when someone walks on another person's head? It depends. Face up, fetish. Face down, hate crime.

thumb_up thumb_down +43

Why did the man have a hole in his head? He was shot.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

How come Helen Keller didn’t scream when she fell off the cliff? Because at 19 months she contracted an illness that left her blind and deaf and therefore never learned to properly use her vocal cords

thumb_up thumb_down -27

HIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII KATE WAS HEREEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

thumb_up thumb_down -3

HEY YOU!!! just checking for assholes

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What's worse than opening your pantry door and finding nothing desirable to eat? Repeated high voltage electrical shocks to the anus.

thumb_up thumb_down +1

A man and a woman are in bed together and really want to do something, what is that something? Sleep.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

only downer about having sex in the dark is........................ when u look out window and guy u thought u were sleeping with waving and laugh

thumb_up thumb_down +34

What's black and shouldn't have the right to vote? Ants

thumb_up thumb_down -23

If life gives you melons ... You might be dyslexic

thumb_up thumb_down +24

Why does pavement get hot. Because it’s black. How could you tell she had bruises. Because they were black. Why did the boy drop out of school. Because he was dying of melanoma.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops