Roses are red, violets are blue, I don't like anyone who is not a straight, white male.

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yo mamma so ugly I think she has cancer

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You go on Nero, he got all red, not sure if he is mad or ashamed or both, but we can all tell that man is jealous. Employee.

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A: Knock knock B: Who's there? A: Hello, I'm a Jehovah's Witness and I would like to talk to you about religion for a few minutes. B: Thank you, but I'm not interested. A: OK, thank you for your time, sir. B: You're quite welcome. Good day. A: Have a nice afternoon. B: You too. Bye A: Ba-bye.

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25 kids go into the water. shark in the water. 10 come out. Ice cream man deals with the rest of 'em.

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There once was a man from Nantucket, who had his car stolen and wasn't very happy so called the police.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was very scary.

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if life gives you lemons. squeeze one into your moms eye.

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How many republicans does it take to raise the debt ceiling? Technically, none, as the president has the right to do this based on the 14th amendment.

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Ask this to your friend. "Yo man, I really need your help on this question. Can you tell me color comes after 9?" guaranteed "wtf"

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chuck norris will never have a heart attack because he has great cardiovascular health.

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Q: how do u make a fireman cry? A: set his wife on fire

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why was the old man on the ground he fell

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Q. Which is longer ... a rope ?

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Across the street was a strip mall containing a dry cleaners where he had to pick up his suit for his cousins wedding. The wedding caused controversy in the family considering she was jewish. He had a lot to drink and took a cab home, knowing the dangers of drunk driving in todays society. He had a great time.

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Jesus once got nailed to a cross, beaten and gave his life in order to prove he was immortal. Safe to say, people remain impressed even 2000 years later. Moral: Lol, hey, its quite a feat, but what life did he give if he was immortal? Jesus is a okay dude though, he stole donkeys from stables (for transport) and when his disciples asked if stealing was bad he replied: God will provide for them. Awesome.

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Why did the dog stop barking. It was given a good reason to.

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Everyone is equal. It doesn't matter if you're black, red, yellow, brown, or normal.

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Two peanuts walked into a bar one was as'salted'

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What's dark, scary, and full of puppies? My van. I lied about the puppies...

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How come the bartender didnt let the black guys in the bar Because the bar was closed.noone was aloud in the bar

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Polite cow who recognizes normal social cues and civilly waits for its turn to contribute to a conversation. Polite cow who recognizes normal social cues and civilly waits for its turn to contribute to a conversation who? Moo.

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A man walks into a bar. It leads to a fight that is enjoyable to watch.

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whats green at the bottom of a hole and covered in cookie crumbs a girl scout run over by a truck

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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