what did one swedish guy say to another swedish guy? I dont speak russian

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Joe Paterno walks into a bar...he should've walked into a police station and filed a report.

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My aunt used to say slow and steady wins the race she died in a fire

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Yo mama so fat, that she's even bigger than the universe!

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So I picked my nose while peeing, and it fell in the toilet so I didn't have to wipe it on anything. This is more of a story I wanted to share than a joke

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Dude, you're never going to guess how stupid my friend Philip is! Really? What did he do?? Nothing. Philip will be attending the prestigious Princeton University next year and is therefore an incredibly intelligent human-being. You're an idiot for believing me.

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Q:What do you call Black Jesus ? A:Black Jesus a.w. j.p.

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too bad about that wild ball, you otherwise played a fantastic softball game

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What do Jews and gays have in common? They both would have been killed during the Holocaust.

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whats worse then getting robbed by a black man? -getting hit by a bus due to not having the needed currency to get a ride home

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Wanna hear a "Friday" parody? No, that would be copyright infringement.

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Why didn't the Hispanic man get elected? Because his policies were unpopular.

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Why is there so much hate in the world? Because you touch yourself at night.

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How do you make a japanese man horny? Mutilate his girlfriend

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why did the polar bear bury his face into snow? because he saw the 241543903 post and wanted to join in so he used a portal gun to teleport his head into some guy's freezer.

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What's the name of Hellen keller's dog? She doesn't have a dog, she's blind and deaf and would not be able to give it the adequate amount of care. Additionally, it's morally reprehensible to make fun of Helen Keller.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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Your Mother is so stupid that not only can she not peform basic mathematical sums, but she frequantly makes spelling errors

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01010010001010010100100101001001010010100100100100100100100100100100100100010010101010101010101011010101010110010101010 Dolphin

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How do you get a black guy out of a tree? Get a ladder and help him down

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Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

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Why did Justin Bieber wake up Lady Gaga? He needed to ask her a question.

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What do you get when you shoot 3 cute kittens that have just walked into the house? 3 dead kittens

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Your mother is so fat the she is clinically obese.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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