Knock knock. whos their! Grammar police. We'd like to have a little chat.

Why does Susie fall off the swing? I shot her in the head with a pistol.

A grandmother in her late seventies is walking to the grocery store. Then out of nowhere,she stats getting pelted by bananas. One hits her hard on the head,and she dies.

porcupines love sun bathing in the winter months so it dosent rape their nose hairs

Someone listens to an anti joke. They laugh.

What did the tiger say to the jellyfish? Nothing; tigers can't talk. And if they could the chances of a tiger meeting a jellyfish would be very slim.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

A Chinese man walked into a bar. He now has a minor concussion.

roses are grey violets are grey so says my color blind cousin

What do you call a guy with out any arms or legs floating in the ocean? Bob

Ben: Something smells like updog. Jenny: What's updog? Ben: Nothin' much

What do you call a black man on the moon? A miracle

Q. you know who is so sad A. you for looking up a site for jokes that aren't even good

A dog is walking down the street. The dog catcher promptly arrives and takes him to the pound. Two months later the dog is in a new, happy home with a wonderful family.

wanna hear a joke? i dont

A Jewish man and a blonde were in a DIY store, the man buys a box of screws. The woman gets a phone call to find out her son is late for tennis training. She then hangs up the phone and leaves the DIY store with great hast.

What do you call a black man flying a plane? A pilot, you racist.

the game

Me: Knock Knock Mom: Who's there? Me: Jason Mom: Jason who Jason: HOW COULD YOU FORGET ME I CAN'T BELRIVE YOUR ALZHEIMER'S HAS GOTTEN THAT BAD! WHY DOES THIS HAPPEN TO ME BWAAA! *Jason sadly died short after from a bus hitting him*

What did the train say at the party Thomas isn't really dumb ass

what did the tree say when it fell down? Nothing it is humanly impossible for a tree to talk. Especially after it fell down. I mean that would hurt.

why didn't the chicken cross the road. Because it was hit by a truck.

Sloths

Roses are red, violets are blue, I don't like anyone who is not a straight, white male.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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