i am an idiot if you read this outloud your a dumb ass

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What's the difference between a rock and a baby? You can't have sex with the rock.

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Q:What do you call an insecure person A:Somebody who is likely to commit suicide

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ok so there was a black guy a white guy and an asian in a bar.so the asian guy says lets leave and they all exited the bar.

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What would happen if nyan cats crashed with eachother? It would be a great impact, and we'd all be sad.

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why would you thank the KKK because they killed the president

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How many Jews can you fit in an ash tray? 1 million.

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What has two legs but can't walk? A quadriplegic man who lost mobility in his legs due to a horrific logging accident.

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well the duck walked up to a lemonade stand, and he said to the man, running the stand "quack" then went on its way

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Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was a woman...

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Why didn't Steve finish his homework? He didn't want to.

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What do you call a big group of Chinese people on Mars? An extraordinary feat for the Chinese space program and a historic day in human history, where a particular country has set up the first human colony on another planet and we have proven to ourselves that our race is capable of interplanetary travel and can accomplish anything if we set our minds to it.

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I know a lady who is SOOO fat that when she steps into the ocean, she gets her toes wet!

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Knock Knock Who's There? Nobody, you have no friends.

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What did Batman say to Robin before he got into the car? "Robin, get in the car."

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A man walks into a bar, the other man ducks.

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I'm shy. The last shitbender. How do you fit babies in that bowl? Get a blender.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I rhyme like lil Wayne Fridge

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A black man has 100 problems. on his AP calculus test.

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You know what they say about big shoes? Big socks. You know what they say about big socks? Big feet. You know what they say about big feet? Big hands. You know what they say about big hands? Cancer.

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roses are red, violets are blue, get on your knees ho, and stick to me like glue.

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What do you call a dragon that doesn't breathe fire? A Griffin.

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How do you get a baby to stop crying Cut its head off

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whats worse than the holacost? your mom giving you cubes in your drink when you requested crushed instead

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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