YOU MEAN SHE ACTUALLY EVER LIKED ME? WOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHH! Anyway, tell her to contact me here, during the number of letters up there divided by a certain number you got over there, minus the letters here subtracted with the VEEEEEEERY same ammoooouuuuunt... Moral: God I need to invent a code system that makes me sound less like Jim Carrey on crack...

What do you call a dog with three legs, is blind, and has terminal cancer? UnLucky

Why couldn't the immigrant who was brand new to America hold a conversation with anyone? He was mute.

Sorry, I need to take care of business up here, it is for the best that we do not communicate for a while, suspicions are going to be flaring up all over the place You better keep your head low, the place with the code-name "The Kings Throne" was under attack, but as you might know, its not what it used to be, you should all leave Point Zero in 3-4 hours when the dust has settled. Personally I suspect it is someone from the past, yes rivals, but according to the information nobody that knows who "The Nero" is, so as you can already tell, you and I are in equal danger until this is resolved. I promise to call you someday

One man's junk is another man's pleasure.

So this blond chick walks into a bar, and orders a drink.

Roses are red Violets are blue I have a short term memory Roses are red

Name two things that are stupid and can get stupider. You can't , there's only one a blonde

What will you never see? A white Guy that can jump.

The adventures of Helen Keller:

Batman and Robin are about to get into the Batmobile. What does Batman say? "Get in the car Robin."

what did the black man eat for dinner? a sandwich

If it hadn't been for Cotton Eyed Joe My wife and kids would still be alive.

What isyellow and can't swim? a bulldozer

why did jimmy win the lottery? WAFFLE

Q: What is better than Vagina? A: Nothing

A white straight man, a black gay man, and an Asian bisexual woman walk into a bar. They are enjoying their drinks until one overly intoxicated man makes a remark towards the group in reference to their diversity in race, sexual orientation, and sex. The bar crowd is enthused with the drunk man's genius in not only constructing a joke to cover all three categorical descriptions of the group, but in guessing each member's sexuality based on their respective appearances.

A Native American walks into a bar. The bartender notes that this is statistically unlikely because Native Americans are part of a small minority in the local area, but is accepting of all people so still serves him a drink.

Your existance.

Q. What happened to the girl who locked her keys in her car? A. I raped her.

Your momma's so fat, diet and exercise would probably save her life!

"I saw daddy with mommy last night. I think he was stealing my milk."

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The holocaust. Guys holocaust jokes aren't funny Anne-Frankly, I do nazi the point in them.

This is a joke.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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