Why did the swing fall off the girl? I have dyslexia

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A father and son are involved in a car crash. The father is killed, sadly, but the boy is rushed to the hospital. The doctor prepares for surgery, and since this boy has no family-connections to her, she performs successful surgery on him, and the boy goes home after 3-5 days.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why do all black people have nightmares? Beacause we killed the only one with a dream..

thumb_up thumb_down +43

What's brown and rhymes with snoop? Dr. Dre.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Whats has no comedic value? A brick

thumb_up thumb_down -2

I stepped into the bathroom and began to take a shower. Then, I panicked. I was so thirsty, and I did not take the advantage to drink some water before I stepped into the bathroom. But then I realized: "Wow, I am so silly. I am standing under the shower, so I could easily just expedite my washing and drying, exit the bathroom, get dressed, and grab something to drink from the kitchen!" Then I showered quickly and got something to drink.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

Q: What is soft, fuzzy, and lives in the woods? A: Yeti

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Alt F4

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Q. Whats does the kid and the dog have in common? A. The kid has Herpes.

thumb_up thumb_down +22

An Asian woman is driving home from work. She gets in an accident and is killed instantly. Her family is traumatized.

thumb_up thumb_down +17

I own two ferrets. I was merely stating something factual.

thumb_up thumb_down -8

I always tell people " I have the heart of a child! " Then I continue "It's in a jar on my desk"

thumb_up thumb_down +31

Whats more realistic than evolution? Everything

thumb_up thumb_down +8

a hard working man goes home after a long day at work to find that his wife left him for his even harder working father.

thumb_up thumb_down -11

LO LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOPLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOO O O O O O O OLO LOL OL O LO LO LO L OL -LOL GUY

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What's the best thing about the Pixies? Their music.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

A man walks into a bar. He says ouch.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Single man, interested in women. Profession: Particle Physicist. Looking for: A strong interaction with a strange, charming woman. One who will ride both up and down the roller-coaster of a relationship, that is not fussy about being top or bottom and that is not impartial to the many flavours of life. I look forward to you spinning me around; Yours Sub-atomically, Professor Quark.

thumb_up thumb_down -9

do you currently smoke? i hope not.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

What do Selena and Justin, Kate and William, and Barack and Michelle all have in common? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What happened to the chicken when it crossed the road? Nothing because the cars that almost hit it swerved off the road.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What do you call a Muslim man flying a plane? The pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down -26

Why can't vegetarians eat mushrooms because I can't urinate over a scotch bonnet :/

thumb_up thumb_down -10

what did the bannana say to the milk carton. nothing bannanas cant talk and their on the other side of the store

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops