Why did Zayne have no friends? Because he is retarded.

A white guy, a black guy, and a spanish guy jump off a building. They all die on impact and their families mourn their loss for years to come.

A robot walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "can I get you a drink?" The robot replies, "No, I'm a robot."

What comes after 69? 70

Why should you paint a canoe black? Being the darkest color, it will hide dirt, scratches, and normal wear and tear on your canoe better than lighter colors.

Billy Corgan: The world is a vampire! Me: No it's not. The world is a mass of mineral compounds that floats in space approximately 93,020,000 miles from the sun. It is not, in fact, a vampire.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

What's my name? I don't know u tell me.

Who didn't allow the gorilla into the ballet studio? Whoever was in charge.

Richard fell off a cliff. He hit the pavement and died on contact. If only he knew he could fly.

what does a jew want most for hanukkah? presents

why couldnt hellen keller drive? cuz she was blind

Why did the black homeowner default on his house? He was paying significantly more in mortgage than the actual market value of the home, since he purchased his property before the housing bubble. He carried out a cost/benefit analysis and derived the conclusion that he was effectively destroying his own wealth by paying his mortgage bills.

what did the radish say to the orange i'm a radish

A black man sits down to have a legal conversation with his state appointed attorney for the first time being arrested. They lawyer advises him to tell him the truth of exactly what happened. He proceeds to do so and is provided with excellent legal advice.

your mom is so poor that now your family is at risk of losing there home

Two muffins are sitting in an oven. The first muffin turns to the second and says "it sure is getting hot in here!". The second muffin looks over and responds "this makes no sense - we shouldn't be capable of speech, let alone self-awareness." "We probably should try to get out of here, though."

What's worse than losing your phone? Getting raped anal until phones fall out

Know what's worse than three bee stings? living every day in fear of your schizophrenic hallucinations

Tic tac toe Your mother and I are getting a divorce.

Knock knock. Who's there? FedEx. FedEx who? Just kidding, it's hookers.

why was the black guy crying because he was getting whiped because he wasent working in the felids

Why does this dog have herpes? Global Warming.

What's worse than being hit by a mini van? Being hit by 5 mini vans.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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